College Council Minutes by Friar Bell,
The day has been anything short of eventful. Co-President Mac Harman wakes up to find his car is toilet-papered (fortunately with the school variety, so, due to the high ratio of air to actual paper, it changed states and evaporated not long after he discovered it). Apparently it was the work of a disgruntled lice-carrying frosh who front-loaded on some ripe Apple Barn Cider he had hoarded from snacks in September and recently discovered in his sock drawer. I personally have decided to launch a soap for the Willinet TV programming: "As Bell's Knee Hurts." My knee would play lead. Will it be crutches or the cane? Does the knee fall hopelessly in love with the dashing McDavid knee brace, or the constant, loving and well-tanned Ace Bandage. What kind of damage does Bell, it's owner, subject it to? Tonight's episode involved cutting a corner to close on my way to the Council meeting and introducing my knee to the broadside of a blue mailboxes. I think I set it back a couple weeks.
Introduction: Co-President Amanda Cowley came bearing pamphlets, ribbons and that dreamy smile indicating the early stages of Food Coma (At Large rep. Kate Shillingsworth Ervin had whipped up a huge meal for Council of Chicken Stir Fry, served on a nice bed of Fried Lice). Fortunately neither OSHA (U.S.Occupational Safety and Health Association) nor BURP (Berkshire Union of Ribbon Placers) was there, as the yet-to-be-unionized Council worked tirelessly on these AIDS packages with poor and often inconsistent lighting(our fault...going overboard with Griff tech.), in strongly scented ambience (one of my shoes was half-off) and really no job security (now with NAFTA, you know it...the North Adams Free Trade Agreement).
Cte Reports: 1.Safety Cte: Carrie Ryan (00chr, not certain) let us know that this Cte deals with issues of security, fire, management of hazardous materials (though they work closely on this with Dining Services) and chemical spills. Finkbeiner suggested they look at better path rerouting in front of Goodrich for when the ice cometh, people will be looking into getting P.E. credit for the Slip and Slide that will follow. 2.Winter Study: Meghan Byrne (98meb, as of now, no) candidly said this CC thing was new to her. We approved of her honesty (26-0-4). New items include the prospect of allowing a Log presentation instead of a 10 page paper for 99s. Gargoyle, (a group made up of people who have successfully spotted the Gargoyle(s) on the north facade of Morgan), is working with them on it. 3.Cte on Undergraduate: Paul Friedmann (00pjf, claims it is just dandruff) with Jeremy Rothe-Kushel (00jwr, it's pretty obvious, "it's just snow" worked fine yesterday, though) reported they are working to increase the number of quality non-alcoholic events and would love ideas. While there could be something inherently difficult with that, but I have already posed the idea of bringing back the kegger at Perry (the secret being that Bell has swapped the 4 kegs of "Hair of the Lice-Free Dog Smoked Double Bock Butte Ale" for 8 fun-sized quarter kegs of "Deputy Dog's Darn Near Beer." Anyone with me? It is the line, the plastic cups and the ambience we need, and well, perhaps the tipsy free spirit that allows us to do the Macarena in public places. 4.Bookstore Cte: Christopher Bell (02csb, who has had lice since the fourth grade) is happy to report that we have a bookstore. Water St. Books is essentially College-owned, at least we contract Fallit to run it out of a the leased space (a rather unorthodox situation, we own the back half, lease the front half, and pay for the bathroom on a flush-by-flush basis). New pointman Mark Ouillette (mouillet@williams. edu, possibly in the southern regions, the northern pole was fairly exposed and, to put it nicely, not very thickly wooded) is a terrific guy, spear-heading projects like increasing selection depth, broadening vendors, more quantities of used books and the stocking of magazines (he is taking suggestions). Bell's simply want is to feel out the campus on bringing the bookstore to Spring St.: Comfy chairs? Slowly sipping a mochachino? Warmed by a crackling fire? Better than Enya playing in the background? You tell me. Per visit, the average Barnes and Noble shopper spends upwards of 2 hours browsing/reading, if we reach two hours at Water St. it is waiting in line to buy our course books.
Opinions: Bert Leathersocks handled opinions this week. 1Many people wrote in about having the bookstore closer to campus. I released an emphatic, Dineroesque (Scent of a Cambodian) "Hoo-ah." 2Others supported the notion of improving the weight room. 3Lastly, a cry for a new way to publicize on campus. Billboards on Baxter lawn? Blimps over Billsville?
Opinion Updates: Sam Abelson (snazzed out in a classy yet svelte brown get-up) tells us the card-reader and billtaker in Baxter has been fixed numerous times. While under warranty, their is no (lice) explanation for the recent failures. Brian Connors had trouble maintaining a straight face while discussing the poorly-named signage on campus with B&G, so progress has been slow. Lloyd Nimetz and Jim Hodgkins are working out the idea of closed-caption TV in Baxter. Showing CHN is Hodgkins (his personal fav.) suggestion, apparently similar to the Airport News Network. Bert on the 24-hour space: CES currently has it's library open 24 hours, not to mention MCC and Rice. Member's Open Time: Anh Nguyen says Perry O. Hanson III will be bringing email terminals to the waiting room of the Health Center. Apparently, they are beyond Jesup's ability to revive them. One typically slow machine, named Cole Rayne, is being tested for lice. MBryson will research his hope to get more court time (bball). Clarissa Shen rose the issue of weighing the campus-wide free issue of Faculty/Staff book. She loves the Faculty/Staff, but perhaps a facebook on-line? Perhaps put the money towards a campus-wide issue of the currently $10 Upperclass book?
Budgets: 1.Cooking Club: This stirred Gaudino-level debate, as we had the proponents on hand (Brian, Denise and Matt) to let us know that the CES has indicated it will match dollar for dollar spent on equipment (contingent that it is in the CES kitchen), the TimeLife cookbooks from '65 were the best the library has to offer (I believe Split Pea Soup was cutting edge at that time) and Wild Oats had really good bulk prices, hence the membership request. We decided the big chunk (food cost) need to be lessened and $225 became the magic figure which passed (23-3-0).
Weekly Calendar: CEAC has written up a statement advocating removal of Calendar's from SU Boxes and instead put it into smaller piles "around campus." The Council debated the loss in its removal, but a 26-1-0 vote confirmed support to the CEAC statement.
NCAA Statement: By a vote of 27-0-0, (random thoughts by
Mike Darowish who took over the computer: "mac did a beautiful
dramatic reading of the proposal. bell got a phone call. wesleyan sent a
48k-sized message, spent 10k apologizing for it's length. says they're attached
to walk-on athletes. bell is over there playing with the lights. bell gave
me lice. sleep with your eyes open and a hat on your head. bell's acoming
to town.) we passed Mac and Amanda's statement. By a vote of 1-0-0,
Bell has chosen to head to bed (4:01 am). Dr.Thunderlice.
Missing In Action: Katie Hansen, Ben Finholt, Eric Soskin and Beth Lambert
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