1. Realm: The Kingdom of Tonga
Subrealm: Tonga is the Definition of a Sub-Realm
Question: Fifty years of Williams Trivia contests might seem like a lot to you.  That's because you're not a reptile.  To them, half a century is the blink of an eye... or would be, if they blinked.  The animal with the greatest verified age was Tu'i Malila, a radiated tortoise who hatched in Madagascar in 1777, and was brought to Tonga as a gift to the royal family.  Tu'i lived the rest of his 188 years as a resident of the Friendly Islands.  Question number one!  And you must answer in Tongan, because English will NOT be accepted.  How old was Tu'i Malila the radiated tortoise in 1877?
Answer: Taha Noa Noa (Tongan for "one hundred").
Song: It's Been a Long, Long Time
Artist: Louis Armstrong
2. Realm: Question Number Ua
Subrealm: Taha More Time!
Question: Tonga!  Question number one in our contest... forever number one in our hearts... and now the nation of Tonga is #1 in the entire world!  Tell us how!
Answer: It's the world's fattest country.  (By average weight.)
Song: We Are a Crowd
Artist: the Lonely Island (will need to edit and play twice);
3. Realm: Defunct Baseball Franchises
Subrealm: C'est La Vie
Question: The Montreal Expos played their final game in 2004.  Who is the most successful player drafted by the Montreal Expos who is still active today?
Answer: Tom Brady.   (The New England Patriots' quarterback was drafted as a catcher in the 18th round of the 1995 MLB draft.)
Song: Big Balls
Artist: AC/DC
4. Realm: Media-Savvy Argentinians
Subrealm: With Pointy Hats
Question: Pope Francis said that if this group came to him asking to be baptized, he would gladly do it because, in his words, "who are we to close the doors to the Holy Spirit?"  What often-feared group did Pope Francis volunteer to baptize?
Answer: Space aliens.
Song: Locked Out of Heaven
Artist: Bruno Mars
5. Realm: Sex in Shakespeare
Subrealm: As You Lick It
Question: Most of us can agree that the weirdest William Shakespeare stage direction is "Exeunt, pursued by a bear."  So we hope we can all agree on which Shakespeare stage directon is the dirtiest.  Name that sexy, sexy stage direction from "As You Like It."
Answer: "Enter Hymen."
Song: Break On Through to the Other Side
Artist: the Doors
6. Realm: Disney in Wartime
Subrealm: Someday My Prince Will Come
Question: During World War II, the Australian Fourth Medical Corps Division created a propaganda poster featuring Donald Duck.  What inspirational message was Donald sending to the troops down under?
Answer: To use condoms.
Song: Rubber Duckie
Artist: Ernie (in German)
Note: The poster depicted a naked woman in the bushes, and an angry Donald Duck saying, "And me without a pro!" as in "prophylactic.")
Note: SCORERS: Teams must say that it's in German.
Note: The title: "Quietscheentchenlied"
7. Realm: Movie Ratings
Subrealm: Off the Grid
Question: On the Internet Movie Database, or imdb.com, all movies ever made are rated on a scale of 1 to 10.  All movies, that is, but one.  Which film is the only exception?
Answer: "This is Spinal Tap."  It alone is rated on a scale of 1 to 11.
Song: One Step Beyond
Artist: Madness
8. Realm: Jews in Sport
Subrealm: Let's Get the Rebbe to Rummm-ble!
Question: Jewish news website Forward.com released its list of the 50 most influential Jews for 2015. Who says Jews can't do sports?  The list includes two athletes: boxer Dustin Fleischer, and one other athlete who is also the youngest individual on the list.  Who?
Answer: American Pharoah. (Let the debate begin, as he was ten years too young to be bar mitzvahed.)
Song: Werewolf Bar Mitzvah
Artist: Tracy Jordan (aka Tracy Morgan)
Break: PROGRAMMING ALERT:  Question and Song #9 must be played at 11 o'clock, with the order of questions adjusted if needed.
Break: Question #10 must be read immediately following, and in conjunction with Question #9.
9. Realm: This is an Awfully Good Question For Us
Subrealm: To HAVE.
Question: Possibly the greatest cartoon ever made is "Little Red Riding Rabbit," featuring Bugs Bunny, a hungry wolf, and a really annoying, eardrum-shattering damsel in distress.  When we first see Little Red Riding Hood, she is singing a song at the top of her leather lungs.  What is the title of this song?
Answer: "Five O'Clock Whistle."
Song: Five O'Clock World
Artist: the Vogues
10. Realm: Long Distance Dedications
Subrealm: The Tom Gardner Memorial Question
Question: Over the last several contests, at the personal request of BOMO's bodacious bohunk Tom Gardner, teams have played the Vogues song "Five O'Clock World" at 5 o'clock.  We just bent to Tom's unyielding force of will and played it during the previous question.  But it wasn't that we were impatient.  Why were we 100% correct to play the song when we did?
Answer: Because it's 5 o'clock in Tonga.
Song: Right Time of the Night
Artist: Jennifer Warnes
11. Realm: Death
Subrealm: And Kittens
Question: In their first-ever appearance together, these ruthless twin antagonists murdered two kittens with poison.  Using powers unknown, they each have come back from the dead hundreds of times.  Who are they?
Answer: Spy vs Spy.
Song: Cold War
Artist: Janelle Monae
Note: The first "Spy vs Spy" took place at an outdoor cafe.  Neither Spy trusted the other, and each poured his tea onto the ground.  Two thirsty kittens proved that the Spys' mutual suspicion was warranted.
Break: Three weeks ago, music lost a comprehensively skilled musical force.  Well, we didn't lose him-- he was laying right there on the floor.  Nevertheless, Prince was the greatest, and we're going to spend the next three questions saluting the little genius.
12. Realm: Attention Shoppers
Subrealm: The Boss is in the House
Question: Frank W. Woolworth founded the first of his famous 5-and-10 variety stores in 1878.  Thirty years later, he had nearly 600 of them.  To keep an eye on his business, he would make anonymous, unannounced visits to his various stores.  What was the first thing he would do when he got there?
Answer: Shoplift.
Song: Take Me With U
Artist: Prince
Note: He wanted to see which stores would catch him, and sometimes promoted the employees who did.
13. Realm: Sports Cheating Scandals
Subrealm: That Don't Involve Inflating Footballs or Mark McGwire's Roast Beef Neck
Question: Eight years ago, the runner-up team for a sports championship had its status stripped by the governing body for using three ineligible athletes.  What was the championship, and why were the athletes deemed to have broken the league rules?
Answer: The Gay Softball World Series.  The athletes were ruled to be "non-gay."
Song: I Could Never Take the Place of Your Man
Artist: Prince
14. Realm: Mathematical Breakthroughs
Subrealm: Aww, No One Told Us There Would Be Math on This Contest
Question: Hippasus of Metapontum showed that the square root of 2 must be described as an irrational number, thereby opening up mathematics to a whole new world of complexity.  How was he celebrated for this important discovery?
Answer: He was thrown off a boat and drowned.
Song: Something in the Water (Does Not Compute)
Artist: Prince
Note: Followers of Pythagoras, who believed math could be explained only by ratios of whole numbers, objected to his theorem.
15. Realm: Three Men, One Dream
Subrealm: One Question, Anyway
Question: What did Dean Martin, William Clark, and Murphy have in common?
Answer: Partners named Lewis.  (Martin and Lewis; Lewis and Clark; Robocop)
Song: Louie Louie
Artist: the Kingsmen
16. Realm: Gaze Upon the Heavens Above
Subrealm: Or Else
Question: According to an official news source which we have chosen not to reveal until we read the answer to this question, what significant change to the skies above Earth occurred on February 16, 1942-- and why did this occur?
Answer: A new star appeared.  This was because Kim Jong-Il was born (according to official North Korean history).
Song: Up There
Artist: Satan (from South Park: Bigger, Longer, Uncut)
17. Realm: Chess Moves
Subrealm: Kook to Nut 4
Question: The famous 1972 chess championship between Bobby Fischer and Boris Spassky was a swamp of insanity.  Fischer complained about the lights, the spectators and the cameras.  Spassky's team claimed Fischer had a miniature radio transmitter telling him what moves to make.  They flew a sample of Spassky's orange juice to Moscow to be tested for poison.  Fischer also protested the chess pieces themselves; specifically, the knights.  What was his complaint?
Answer: The noses on the horses were too long.
Song: The Right Profile
Artist: the Clash
18. Realm: Secret Ballots
Subrealm: Public Shame
Question: Who got the most lifetime electoral votes without ever getting to become Mr. President?  We've got the top three; name two.
Answer: William Jennings Bryan (493 electoral votes-- 3 tries);  Thomas Dewey (288-- 2 tries);  Al Gore (266).
Song: Didn't We Almost Have It All
Artist: Whitney Houston
Note: 4th through 8th-- Charles Hughes (254);  John Kerry (251);  Mitt Romney (206);  Henry Clay (191-- 3 tries);  Hubert Humphrey (191
Note: start fade out around 3:00
19. Realm: Yummy Things to Eat
Subrealm: And a Couple That Would Break Your Teeth Off
Question: Film reels.  Hershey's Kisses.  Sushi.  Seashells.  Broken 45 records.  Snowballs.  Whipped cream cannisters.  Sesame Street's Elmo.  Lollipops.  Cupcakes.  Strawberries.  Roses.  Fruit salad.  Peppermints.  A banana.  A Smurf.  What do these things have in common?
Answer: Katy Perry has used them all to cover her breasts.
Song: The Hills
Artist: the Weeknd
20. Realm: This Question Will Set Your Mind Aglow with Whirling, Transient Nodes of Thought Careening Through a Cosmic Vapor of Invention
Subrealm: (spoken by someone else) Ditto!
Question: Of all the stars in Hollywood history, Mel Brooks has the most, with six.  Six what?
Answer: Fingers on his concrete handprint, at Grauman's Chinese Theatre.
Song: The Impression That I Get
Artist: Mighty Mighty Bosstones
21. Realm: Oh, The Places You'll Go!
Subrealm: But Bring a Moist Towelette
Question: What do the following things have in common: a train, an airplane, a submarine, an inflatable raft, a forest, a hospital, a hot tub, a horse stable, an artificial iceberg, a space shuttle, a submersible pod, and a Ferris wheel?
Answer: They're all places where James Bond has had sex.
Song: I Get Around
Artist: the Beach Boys
Break: It was the 47th contest, hosted by Harry "Snapper" Organs, that first brought a new form of terror to William Trivia.  And we can describe that terror in one word: The Horrible Song Quartet.  The painful voices, the crappy arrangements, the feeblest cover versions.  There are so many ways to be bad.  But you only need to worry about four ways.  We inflict the first of those ways on you now.
22. Realm: Baseball
Subrealm: 1-for-14,000 is a Tough Batting Average
Question: There have been over 14,000 major league players in the history of baseball, but one stands alone.  Outfielder Austin Jackson is the only player with this distinction, with twice as many as his nearest competitor.  What distinction?
Answer: Both his first and last name are state capitals.
Song: State of Shock
Artist: the Jacksons (with Mick Jagger)
23. Realm: Our Dwindling National Reserves
Subrealm: But of What?
Question: In 1939, there were 124.  Now there is just one.  One what?
Answer: Munchkin.
Song: People Are Strange
Artist: Tiny Tim
Note: The last survivor is 96-year-old Jerry Maren, who played one of the members of the Lollipop Guild.
Break: Sadly, you are only halfway through the Horrible Song Quartet.  Remember, the air only gets thinner, the further we ascend.
24. Realm: The Steve Homer Memorial Question
Subrealm: Steve Will Be Missed
Question: What phrase, synonymous with an easy win, comes from the practice of jockeys releasing the reins when they have a sizable lead in a horse race?
Answer: "Hands down."
Song: Come On Eileen
Artist: a man squeezing his fists together.
Note: The performer is Gerry Phillips, he calls himself a "manualist," and we recommend his many videos.
25. Realm: Are You Listening to This in State-of-the-Art Surround Sound?
Subrealm: Then You're Wasting Your Time
Question: We're about to play you a sound clip.  [PLAY CLIP].  Okay, let's hear that clip again.  [PLAY CLIP AGAIN].  Would one more time help?  [PLAY CLIP A THIRD TIME].  Please tell us what you just heard. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Vqvq-f-UtU
Answer: It's the oldest recording in the world.
Song: Every national anthem at once.
Note: In 1860, scientist Edouard-Leon Scott de Martinville sang "Au Clair de la Lune" while a stylus on his "phonautograph" recorded the sound waves onto a sheet of smoke-covered paper.  He was only interested in studying the waves, as there was no way  to play back his audio.   A decade ago, his paper wave charts were scanned into a computer and turned into a playable file, which you have just heard.  The result predates all other known recordings by 28 years.
Break: Thankfully, blessedly, mercifully, that concludes the first Horrible Song Quartet.  You heard us right, meat.  The FIRST Horrible Song Quartet.
26. Realm: French Military Strategy
Subrealm: C'mon, Stop Laughing
Question: During the last year of World War One, what did French military planners construct 15 miles north of Paris?
Answer: A second Paris.
Song: My City Was Gone
Artist: the Pretenders 
Note: It was a dummy city built on a winding stretch of the Seine similar to the bend that bisects  real Paris.  It included false streets lined with lights, fake train tracks, fake factories, and wooden replicas of the Arc d'Triomphe, the Opera House and the Gare du Nord.  Radar was rarely used in 1918.  German bombers were flying by sight, and dropping bombs when opportunities arose.
Note: start fading around 4:05
27. Realm: Naked Body Parts on TV
Subrealm: Thanks to Viewers Like You
Question: In 1973,  in a PBS telecast of the play "Steambath," Valerie Perrine became the first woman to appear nude on American television.  Two years later, PBS also became the first U.S. broadcaster to show a naked man.  Who was the actor (and no, it's not Cookie Monster)?
Answer: Terry Jones (seated and playing the organ on "Monty Python").
Song: Along Came Jones
Artist: the Coasters
28. Realm: Relationships
Subrealm: It's Hard to Stay Together
Question: Clinical psychologist Ramani Durvasula has ranked a series of related tasks that require communication skills and conflict resolution between couples.  The ratings go from "easy" to "The Divorcemaker."  What task, performed by thousands of couples every day, is the Divorcemaker?
Answer: Assembling IKEA furniture.
Song: Norwegian Wood
Artist: the Beatles
29. Realm: Paleontology Etymology
Subrealm: With Our Apology
Question: The arrangement of spikes on the tail of a Stegosaurus are recognized by the Smithsonian Institute as the "thagomizer."  Who coined this term?
Answer: Gary Larson.  It was taken from a 1982 "Far Side" comic about the unpleasant demise of a caveman named Thag.
Song: Feel the Pain
Artist: Dinosaur Jr.
30. Realm: British Parliament
Subrealm: Come at the King, You Best Not Miss
Question: In 1605, Guy Fawkes and his other conspirators planned to kill King James I, his family, and most of the government and judiciary by blowing up the House of Lords.  They had rented a lower storage room in the Parliament building and secretly packed it with gunpowder.  The gunpowder was discovered only hours before it was to have been exploded, thereby foiling the plot.  What further action did the British government take 73 years later?
Answer: They decided to stop renting storage space underneath the House of Lords.
Song: Take Your Time, Do It Right
Artist: the SOS Band
31. Realm: Conan O'Brien and the Internet
Subrealm: www.JayLenoIsTheBigChinnedAntichrist.com
Question: Whenever Conan O'Brien's talk show puts an online web address up on the screen, the URL includes one typographical symbol that you may have trouble locating on your standard keyboard.  What is that symbol?
Answer: Wherever the URL has a slash, they use a photo of the rock guitarist Slash.
Song: Top Hat, White Tie & Tails
Artist: Fred Astaire
32. Realm: U.S. Elections
Subrealm: Political Tradition
Question: In 2013, the contest to choose Philadelphia's judge of election for the Fifth Division of the 56th Ward was a race that kind of slipped under the national political radar.   But it shouldn't have.  Why?
Answer: The winner became the first electee from the Whig Party in 150 years.   (The final vote was 36-24.)
Song: Don't Stop the Party
Artist: Pitbull
33. Realm: If At First You Don't Succeed
Subrealm: Try, Try Again
Question: Phillies centerfielder Richie Ashburn holds the all-time major league record in this category, doing something twice in a single at-bat.  What?
Answer: He hit the same fan twice with foul balls.  The second time was while she was being carried out on a stretcher.
Song: Lightnin' Strikes
Artist: Lou Christie
34. Realm: Sixteen Times More Deadly Than Hiroshima
Subrealm: Our Hero!
Question: What popular movie ends with the so-called hero murdering an estimated 1.1 million people in one second?
Answer: "Star Wars."  (Over 1,148,000 people were in the Death Star.)
Song: Stardust
Artist: Billy Ward & the Dominoes
Note: SCORERS: Just Billy Ward is sufficient.
35. Realm: Airports
Subrealm: Take Your Shoes Off Before Answering
Question: What do Chicago's O'Hare Airport, Lyon's Saint-Exupery Airport and Oklahoma City's Will Rogers World Airport have in common?
Answer: They are each named for someone who died in a plane crash.
Song: I'm Goin' Down
Artist: Bruce Springsteen
36. Realm: Mutants
Subrealm: The Original X-Man
Question: According to a study from the University of Copenhagen, every person in the world with a certain physical characteristic can trace it back to a single mutant who lived 10,000 years ago somewhere in the Ukraine. What characteristic which you may have, you mutant you?
Answer: Blue eyes.
Song: The Story in Your Eyes
Artist: the Moody Blues
37. Realm: Manly Men of Maleness
Subrealm: "Parks and Recreation"
Question: According to Ron Swanson's Pyramid of Greatness, crying is only acceptable in two scenarios.  What are they?
Answer: Funerals, and the Grand Canyon.
Song: It's a Man's Man's World
Artist: James Brown & Luciano Pavarotti
38. Realm: Garbage, Dinosaurs and Radiation
Subrealm: And Carrots
Question: What do the following have in common: Oscar the Grouch, Dino from "The Flintstones,"  the Incredible Hulk, and carrots?
Answer: Each was originally a different color.  (Oscar the Grouch was orange, Dino was blue, the Hulk was gray, carrots were purple.)
Song: Get Me Away from Here, I'm Dying
Artist: Belle & Sebastian
39. Realm: Brains on Wheels
Subrealm: Stephen Hawking
Question: Physics, shmizzics.  Professor Stephen Hawking has revealed his real ambition, one that he believes he is uniquely qualified for, due to his digitized voice and wheelchair. What would he like to be doing?
Answer: He wants to play a Bond villain. He thinks the wheelchair and computer voice would make him a great bad guy.
Song: Entropy
Artist: MC Hawking
40. Realm: Inviting Coworkers
Subrealm: Inviting Coworkers
Question: "inviting coworkers."  That's it, "inviting coworkers."  What?
Answer: It's the first tweet ever sent on Twitter.
Song: I've Just Gotta Get a Message to You
Artist: the Bee Gees
Note: Technically, that was the fifth tweet ever sent.  The first four were all identical -- "just setting up my twttr" -- and were automatically sent by a computer.  "inviting coworkers" is the first one intentionally typed by a human.
41. Realm: Superhero Movies, Kids Movies, Comedy Movies and Sci-Fi Horror Movies
Subrealm: That's Our Favorite Kind
Question: The following movies have one thing in common: "Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer," "The Cat in the Hat," "Addams Family Values," and "John Carpenter's The Thing."  What is it?
Answer: Characters named "Thing."  (Come on, that last one should have given it away.)
Song: You've Got Another Thing Comin'
Artist: Judas Priest
42. Realm: Mr. Garth Ranzz
Subrealm: But You May Know Him Better As... Well, Most People Don't
Question: Nobody cares much about Legion of Super-Heroes cofounder Lightning Lad.  But maybe you should!  Because Lightning Lad was the first superhero in comic book history to do something that many, many other superheroes have done many, many times since.  What?
Answer: Get killed, but then come back to life.
Song: See You Again
Artist: Wiz Khalifa
43. Realm: American Vaudeville
Subrealm: Worse Than "the Hook"
Question: Vaudeville comedian Rube Dickinson is the only person in show business history to suffer what ironic death?
Answer: The marquee with his name on it collapsed, and fell on his head.
Song: Got a Lot On My Head
Artist: the Cars
44. Realm: Vatican Banking
Subrealm: Don't Tell Anybody, But My Pin Number is MCDXXXI
Question: You're at the Vatican.  You need some cash.  You go to an ATM.  What unique option will you find at Vatican ATMs that you'll find nowhere else in the world?
Answer: You can conduct your transaction in Latin.
Song: A Whiter Shade of Pale
Artist: Procul Harum
Note: Procul Harum is Latin for "far beyond these things."  However, we don't need to tell you that the word procul is incorrectly followed by the ablative case, and not the genitive!
45. Realm: Comic Book Collecting
Subrealm: The Sadness is Near-Mint
Question: The most ironic auction item in the history of comic books sold for $160,000 in April 2013.  What was it?
Answer: The original $130 check that co-creators Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster got for selling away all future rights to Superman.
Song: Super Stupid
Artist: Funkadelic
Note: Insult to injury: Both their names were misspelled on the check.
46. Realm: It's Time for Large Spindle Bore Trivia
Subrealm: We Hope You All Studied
Question: JPW Industries makes a 3 horsepower geared head engine lathe with a large 4 1/8-inch spindle bore and a clutch operated heatstock.  It's a sturdy machine that weighs 6,700 pounds.  Why is the weight significant?
Answer: It's the heaviest thing you can buy on Amazon that comes with FREE Shipping.
Song: Living with a Hernia
Artist: Weird Al Yankovic
47. Realm: And the Winner Is...
Subrealm: ...Easy to Say
Question: Five movies have been nominated for Best Picture whose titles are no more than three letters long.  Name three of the five.  And for an additional second point, name the longest title of any movie that was a Best Picture nominee.  That makes this question a THREE-POINT PLAY.
Answer: Shortest:  "Z";  "Up";  "JFK";  "Ray";  "Her." Longest: "Dr. Strangelove, or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb."
Song: Tighten Up
Artist: the Black Keys
Note: And if you want four letters, you've got Room;  Babe;  Gigi;  Juno;  Milk;  Hugo;  Argo;  Reds;  Tess;  Jaws;  and M*A*S*H.
48. Realm: Disney
Subrealm: The Drippiest Place on Earth
Question: In the second half of 1946, Disney produced nine short cartoons.  One was about Figaro the cat, two were about Pluto, one was about Goofy, three were about Donald Duck, and one was about Donald Duck AND Goofy.  What was the ninth Disney cartoon about?
Answer: Menstruation.
Song: I'm Late
Artist: Mary Martin (from Disney's "Alice in Wonderland")
Note: It was an educational short called "The Story of Menstruation."
Note: SCORERS: Accept "Alice in Wonderland" in lieu of Mary Martin.
Break: Speaking of "the curse," isn't it about time we had another Horrible Song Quartet?  That's a rhetorical question.  You don't get a vote.  So batten down the hatches, because here it comes.
49. Realm: Elvis Presley
Subrealm: White Trash
Question: What message is printed on the trash cans at Graceland?
Answer: "Thank you.  Thank you very much."
Song: Old MacDonald
Artist: Elvis Presley
50. Realm: Education
Subrealm: My Old High School Never Had That Kind of Costume Budget
Question: In the Glee cover of "Born This Way," the fifteen participating cast members each wore a white T-shirt proudly declaring some characteristic that they might be criticized for.  Name any five of the chesty messages.
Answer: BAD ATTITUDE;  BUTT CHIN;  BROWN EYES;  CAN'T DANCE;  CAN'T SING;  FOUR EYES ;  I'M WITH STOOPID (arrow down towards crotch);  I'M WITH STUPID (arrow up towards head);  LEBANESE;  LIKES BOYS;  LOOSY CABOOSEY;  NOSE;  NO WEAVE!;   OCD;  TROUTY MOUTH.
Song: Hey Ya!
Artist: Kidz Bop
Break: You've made it halfway through the second Horrible Song Quartet.  You are to be commended, and pitied.
51. Realm: Martin Luther King Teaches History
Subrealm: I Have a Theme
Question: Rev. Martin Luther King's famous "Letter from a Birmingham Jail" lists the three qualifications a true act of civil disobedience must have: it must be open, it must be nonviolent, and those involved must accept their punishment willingly.  King then lists some historical examples, including one from U.S. history.  Which American example of civil disobedience did King choose, and how does it meet each of his three criteria?
Answer: The Boston Tea Party.  It doesn't meet any of the criteria.
Song: Treat Your Mother Right
Artist: Mr. T
Note: The Boston Tea Party goes 0-for-3.  They disguised themselves, were armed and caused damage, and dared and defied England to impose punishment.
52. Realm: Sound Effects
Subrealm: Sound Effects That Have Gone Silent
Question: Once, Pow was fourth.  Now, Pow is nowhere.  Who's still first, second and third?
Answer: Snap, Crackle and Pop.  (Pow was the original fourth partner.)
Song: Plop Plop Fizz Fizz
Artist: Sammy Davis Jr.  (Big Band Version)
Break: And that was the fourth and last grotesque abomination in the Horrible Song Quartet.  If this were a 58-question contest, you wouldn't have to live in fear of a third one.
53. Realm: Television
Subrealm: There's Nothing Good On
Question: According to the Nielsen ratings service, more than 106 million people watched nothing happen for half an hour.  What were they watching?
Answer: The blackout during the 2013 Super Bowl.
Song: Flash Light
Artist: Parliament);
Note: 4:20-- cut 1:17 to 1:50?
54. Realm: Repetitive Dialogue
Subrealm: Repetitive Dialogue
Question: Ygritte (EE-gritt) says this sentence five and two-thirds times.  What?
Answer: "You know nothing, Jon Snow."
Song: The Snow Miser Song
Artist: from The Year Without A Santa Claus
Note: During the course of "Game of Thrones."  The sixth time gets cut short by violence, as often happens on the series.
55. Realm: Literature
Subrealm: Putting the Pee in Prose
Question: We like our classic fiction kinky.  Who is the most famous literary character to deliver a golden shower?
Answer: Zeus.  (He literally turns into a rain shower of gold to impregnate Danae, resulting in the birth of Perseus.)
Song: Drops of Jupiter
Artist: Train
56. Realm: Seuss Trivia, Part Two
Subrealm: Well, Dr. Seuss
Question: The Cat in the Hat, it's the Cat in the Hat.  He balanced ten items at once, just like that.  But you needn't name ten, that would be too extreme.  Six will do, for a frumpulous point for your team.
Answer: Teacup, milk, cake, books, rake, toy boat, toy man, hand fan, umbrella, the unhappy fish.
Song: Hard to Handle
Artist: Black Crowes
57. Realm: Zeus Trivia, Part Three
Subrealm: Well, Zeus' Nephew, Anyway
Question: Percy Jackson's cruel stepfather Gabe once told Percy's mother that something did not exist.  Percy's mother proved Gabe wrong.  How?
Answer: By making Percy a diet of blue food.
Song: How Blue Can You Get?
Artist: B.B. King (version from the "Live at the Regal" album)
58. Realm: The 2,000 Year Old Man
Subrealm: Give or Take 1,906 Years
Question: Early last year, Carl Reiner became the only person to sit next to whom?
Answer: Every regular host in the history of NBC's "The Tonight Show."
Song: Tonight, Tonight, Tonight
Artist: Genesis
Note: Reiner has been a guest on episodes hosted by Steve Allen, Jack Paar, Johnny Carson, Jay Leno, Conan O'Brien, and Jimmy Fallon.
59. Realm: Zoology, Ambiguity and Brine
Subrealm: The Worst Legal Firm Ever
Question: It's been official since May 2011.  An anteater is fourth.  An amorphous blob is third.  And a pickle is second.  What is #1?
Answer: The Purple Cow (according to the Readers Digest list of America's Most Lovable College Mascots).
Song: Milkshake
Artist: Kelis
60. Realm: William the Conqueror
Subrealm: Now, Let's Not Be Hastings
Question: William the Conqueror did a lot in his 59 years.  He commissioned the Domesday Book.  He launched the Norman Conquest and won the Battle of Hastings.  He became King of England.  He began construction on the Tower of London.  In the end, he died.  What was the very last thing William the Conqueror did?
Answer: He exploded.
Song: Pushin' Too Hard
Artist: the Seeds
Note: His corpse bloated in the two weeks it took to bury him, and had become too large to fit into his tomb.  When the lid was forced down, William violently ruptured, filling the church with pus, blood and a noxious stench.  He was the original King of Pop.
61. Realm: Exact Pronunciation
Subrealm: Dead Letter Office
Question: What was the only television show title with two silent T's?
Answer: "The Colbert Report."
Song: Silent E
Artist: Tom Lehrer
Note: Pronounced "Coal-BEAR Re-PORE"
62. Realm: Television Shows with Two Silent T's
Subrealm: Not Counting "Sar Rek"
Question: Who was the tallest guest ever to appear on "The Colbert Report"?
Answer: Smaug.
Song: Money
Artist: the Flying Lizards
63. Realm: We Hate to Ask This Question
Subrealm: But We Hate You More
Question: What do the following things have in common: Jews, Islam, the media, priests, troops, dead soldiers, Bush, Obama, McCain, America, the world, Swedes, your idols, your feelings, your tears, adultery, divorce, Lady Gaga, Pope Francis, Boston, Israel, Whitney Houston, Michael Jackson, Keith Urban, Josh Groban, little people, Australia, and YOU?
Answer: They're all things God hates, according to the Westboro Baptist Church.
Song: Why Can't We Be Friends
Artist: War
64. Realm: Halloween Traditions
Subrealm: Kill-iams Trivi-aaaaaghhh!!!
Question: Of all the "Treehouse of Horror" installments of "The Simpsons,"the 1990 one was the only Halloween episode to prominently feature this.  What?
Answer: A treehouse.
Song: I Nearly Lost You
Artist: Screaming Trees
65. Realm: The Sportswriters of America
Subrealm: Drinking Through the Games for 150 Years
Question: In baseball's 1960 Hall of Fame election, pitcher Lefty Grove received only 6 votes, just 2%.  You may think this was harsh because Grove won 300 games, had a terrific postseason record, led his league in ERA 9 times, the most ever, and threw the most strikeouts 7 years in a row.  We think Grove's low vote total was weird, too, but for a different reason.  What?
Answer: He had already been elected to the Hall of Fame 13 years earlier.
Song: Welcome Back
Artist: John Sebastian
66. Realm: Studio Musicians
Subrealm: In Between Mozart and Bach
Question: Lenny and Squiggy, the two fictional knuckleheads from the sitcom "Laverne and Shirley," released a real album in 1979.  Who was listed as the featured guitarist?
Answer: Nigel Tufnel.
Song: The Bugler's Lament (AKA 'Taps')
Note: AKA Christopher Guest.  Guest and Michael McKean, who played Lenny and would later play David St. Hubbins, would go on to collaborate on "This is Spinal Tap."
67. Realm: Video Games
Subrealm: Video Games Your Grandfather Liked
Question: Who designed the prototype for the 1976 Atari arcade game "Breakout"?
Answer: Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak.
Song: Another Brick in the Wall
Artist: Pink Floyd
Note: single version, approx. 3:45
68. Realm: The RNC
Subrealm: Stands for "Really Nifty Chair"
Question: If you go to RNC Chairman Reince Priebus' office, he might let you sit in a very special chair.  What is special about this chair?
Answer: It's the empty chair that Clint Eastwood debated at the 2012 convention.
Song: Elijah
Artist: the Mountain Goats
69. Realm: The Nobel Prize
Subrealm: Science with Benefits
Question: After Niels Bohr won the Nobel Prize in 1922, one of the largest companies in Denmark gave him a house in Copenhagen. What special perk was added to the house?
Answer: Carlsberg installed a free tap which piped an undending supply of beer directly from their brewery into Bohr's house.
Song: Red Solo Cup
Artist: Toby Keith
Note: SCORERS: Teams do not need to name Carlsberg.
70. Realm: I Am Woman, Hear Me Roar
Subrealm: But Men Don't Listen
Question: A study done by two universities showed that between 1950 and 2012, a certain type of victim was killed at twice the rate by females as by males, largely because the victims weren't as afraid of the females.  Due to underlying sexism, they didn't expect the females to hit as hard as the males.  Male and female what?
Answer: Hurricanes.
Song: These Eyes
Artist: the Guess Who
Note: People weren't as afraid of hurricanes given female names, and were much less likely to seek shelter.
71. Realm: 24 Years Ago in Baseball
Subrealm: When Steroids Were Cool
Question: In the year 1992, twenty baseball teams had a future Hall of Famer on their rosters.  Some even had two.  But only three teams had THREE future Hall of Famers playing for them.  We'll even tell you that two of the teams were the 1992 Chicago Cubs and the 1992 Oakland A's.  Which was the third?
Answer: The Springfield nuclear power plant softball team.  (Which had Wade Boggs, Ken Griffey Jr. and Ozzie Smith.)
Song: Uma Thurman
Artist: Fall Out Boy
72. Realm: Good Luck Charms for Movies
Subrealm: But Not for Himself
Question: During his career, this actor appeared in just five full-length feature films, each of which was nominated for the Best Picture Oscar.  Then he died.  Then, twelve years later, he appeared in his sixth movie, which obviously was also nominated for the Best Picture Oscar.  That makes this actor 6-for-6, and we guess we'd better say "so far."  Name the actor and explain his unusual comeback.
Answer: John Cazale.  A flashback of his death in "The Godfather Part 2" was used in "The Godfather Part III."
Song: Michael (Row the Boat Ashore)
Artist: the Highwaymen
73. Realm: Al Green Songs
Subrealm: Deep Soul
Question: Everyone knows the classic song "Take Me To The River", famously written and sung by Al Green and covered by Talking Heads. What other version of the song has earned Al the most royalties by far?
Answer: The version sung by Big Mouth Billy Bass.
Song: Hook
Artist: Blues Traveler
74. Realm: Movies
Subrealm: To the Ten Thousandth Place
Question: What film trilogy adds up to 36.8333?
Answer: The Naked Gun.  (1 + 2 1/2 + 33 1/3)
Song: Pretty Vacant
Artist: the Sex Pistols
75. Realm: Tragic Trivia Trip-Ups
Subrealm: Made By Us
Question: In the January 2009 contest, the stinkers at Stink Stank Stunk asked which animated character's voice had been provided by the same person for the longest time.  The answer then was Daffy Duck, voiced by Mel Blanc for 52 years.  But this was a filthy LIE!  The record is not a measly 52 years, it is a massive 53 years!  Name the animated character who was continuously voiced by the same person for 53 years.  (And the voice person even has a connection with Stink Stank Stunk!)
Answer: Tony the Tiger.
Song: Pour Some Sugar on Me
Artist: Def Leppard 
Note: He was voiced by Thurl Ravenscroft (who also sung "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch").
Note: start a quick fade around 2:54
Break: It's late.  You're tired.  Your senses are dulled, your breath is bad, and your brain is fried.  So it's entirely possible you might actually enjoy this Horrible Song Quartet.
76. Realm: Presidents Named Martin Van Buren
Subrealm: Martin Van Buren
Question: President Martin Van Buren's autobiography, cleverly titled "The Autobiography of Martin Van Buren," ran 776 pages. However, there were some things that Martin preferred not to discuss publicly.  What private detail was not included in his book?
Answer: His entire presidency.  (Also, his marriage.)
Song: Don't Tell Me
Artist: Richard Simmons
77. Realm: Films
Subrealm: Quotable Codas
Question: What is the last line of dialogue in the original 1977 film "Star Wars"?
Answer: "Wrrraaarrrrrrrr!"  (that sound Chewbacca makes).
Song: Chewy Chewy
Artist: the Ohio Express
Break: We know what you're thinking.  "Did they play three Horrible Songs, or only two?"  Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement we kind of lost track ourselves.  But being as this is the 100th contest and another Horrible Song could blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: "Do I feel lucky?"  Well, DO ya... punk?  Trick question!  The answer is no.  Because we are now just two-fifths of the way through the reprogrammed Horrible Song QUINtet.
78. Realm: Netflix and Chill
Subrealm: Inside an Underground Vault
Question: In Season 2 of "The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt," the formerly kidnapped girls are talking to one another about their cult leader, Richard Wayne Gary Wayne, played by Jon Hamm.  They call him a "madman," and they realize that he is truly delusional because he takes credit for creating what?
Answer: The "I'd like to teach the world to sing" hilltop Coca-Cola ad.
Song: Muhammad Ali vs. Mr. Tooth Decay
Note: Which Jon Hamm's character Don Draper supposedly created at the end of "Mad Men."
Note: 12:30 to 16:40 -- but cut out 15:22 to 15:51
79. Realm: The Voracious Environmental Rape of Indigenous Natural Resources by White Male Imperialist Thugs
Subrealm: Curious George
Question: Everybody knows that Curious George was born in Africa, and brought to America by the Man in the Yellow Hat.  But first, the Man in the Yellow Hat had to capture George.  What did the Man in the Yellow Hat use to do this?
Answer: His yellow hat.
Song: I'm Telling You Now
Artist: Freddie & the Dreamers
80. Realm: The Pros from Dover Memorial Question
Subrealm: M*A*S*H
Question: Director Robert Altman was only the second-best paid Altman to work on the original movie version of "M*A*S*H."  Daddy Altman was paid $70,000 for directing, but his son made more than $1 million.  Why did he collect more than 15 times as much as the guy who made the movie?
Answer: Altman's son wrote the words to "Suicide is Painless," the theme from "M*A*S*H."
Song: Die Hard
Artist: Guyz Nite
Break: You have just endured the last Horrible Song Quartet, now with 25% extra horribleness.  Uh... congratulations?
81. Realm: French Animated Features About Four Old Ladies and a Fat Dog Fighting the Mob to Rescue a Kidnapped Bicyclist
Subrealm: We've Narrowed the Choices Down to Our Favorite
Question: The Triplets of Belleville would make excellent contestants on "Iron Chef," because it seems like they spend the entire movie cooking, and every one of their meals contains the same central ingredient.  What?
Answer: Frogs.
Song: Possum Kingdom
Artist: the Toadies
82. Realm: Superhero Sex
Subrealm: Holy Holes, Batman!
Question: In the movie "Deadpool," Wade and Vanessa have an epic and vigorous sex montage, in which the bouncy-bouncy fun times specifically reflect the many holidays of the year.  For example, their Thanksgiving sex involves the use of mashed potatoes.  The most uncomfortable holiday sex for him occurs on International Women's Day, when he gets "pegged" from behind.  Which holiday sex is the most uncomfortable for her, and why?
Answer: While receiving oral sex on Halloween, she says "ouch," then sees that he's been wearing plastic Dracula teeth.
Song: It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year
Artist: Andy Williams
83. Realm: The Movie May Have Only Cost $112 to Make
Subrealm: But Every Dollar of It Is Up There on the Screen
Question: There are many, many western movie scenes in which a cowboy shoots and kills an Indian.  But only "The Apache Woman" featured a particular twist.  This twist was necessitated by the movie's low, low budget.  What was it?
Answer: The same actor played both parts-- the cowboy him killed the Indian him.
Song: I'll Be You
Artist: the Replacements
84. Realm: Pedestrian Safety
Subrealm: Not a Concern
Question: There's no telling how many street signs there are showing silhouettes of children near schools, or the silhouette a man disposing of garbage properly, or the silhouette of a man with a shovel near road construction.  But the street sign that's posted at the Storgata crosswalk in Scandinavia is the only one of its kind in the world.  What is its silhouette?
Answer: John Cleese, doing a "silly walk."
Song: On Bended Knee
Artist: Boyz II Men
85. Realm: Love at First Sight
Subrealm: French Style
Question: It's good to be the king.  In the year 1800, Napoleon was walking in Paris when he spotted a famous woman.  He ordered that she be brought to his bedroom immediately.  Though Napoleon was usually fickle, that's where she spent the next four years.  Who was this woman?
Answer: The Mona Lisa.
Song: Hey Leonardo
Artist: Blessid Union of Souls
86. Realm: Scandal on the High Seas
Subrealm: We Love a Man in Uniform
Question: What ship commander was forced to publicly address ugly rumors three years ago about the legitimacy of his captaincy in the eyes of  the U.S. Navy, due to lacking one of the required four stripes on his uniform?
Answer: Cap'n Crunch.
Song: Lines in the Suit
Artist: Spoon
87. Realm: Williams Trivia's Cruel Legacy
Subrealm: Light the Torches
Question: In the mid-1990s and early 2000s, right here at Williams Trivia, Ethan Zuckerman was a contest bigwig.  He wrote questions.  He wrote bonuses.  But Zuckerman wrote something else during this period that was even more lasting.  What?
Answer: The original code that created the pop-up window.
Song: Words Get in the Way
Artist: Miami Sound Machine
Note: Ethan has said, "I'm sorry.  Our intentions were good."
88. Realm: New Products
Subrealm: Astronomers Don't Like Sharing Space
Question: Astronomers and the FCC are upset because this proposed product might require its users to create networks within the frequency range of 6240 to 6740 megahertz, which is the same band that several enormous radio telescopes operate on.  What is this very outdoorsy product?
Answer: The lawnmowing Roomba.
Song: Grazing in the Grass
Artist: the Friends of Distinction
Note: accept any approximation of this, including Lawnba or Lawn Scooba
89. Realm: Internal Affairs
Subrealm: The Long Arm of the Law
Question: By law, in Arizona, you may keep two of these in your home, but NOT three.  Two of what?
Answer: Dildos.
Song: All By Myself
Artist: Eric Carmen
90. Realm: My Little Pony Plus Weird Al
Subrealm: Equals My Little Polka
Question: In the My Little Pony episode "Pinkie Pride", the plans of party planner Pinkie Pie (say that three times, fast) to throw the "best party ever" for Rainbow Dash are, um, dashed.  A rival planner, voiced by "Weird Al" Yankovic, claims to be the best party planner in Equestria.  Pinkie challenges the interloper to a "goof-off" and much consternation ensues. What we want to know is, what is the name of Weird Al's character?
Answer: Cheese Sandwich.
Song: I Melt With You
Artist: Richard Cheese (featuring Weird Al Yankovic)
91. Realm: Miscellaneous
Subrealm: And Extraneous
Question: The first one hugged its owner.  The second one sneezed, then answered the phone.  The third one rode a skateboard.  And that was it.  Who were they?
Answer: The three animals on the first-ever "Stupid Pet Tricks."
Song: Born Free
Artist: the Lettermen
Note: Late night version.  The segment had appeared on Letterman's little-watched morning show.
92. Realm: Embarrassing Inauguration Day Debacles
Subrealm: Besides Maya Angelou's Poem
Question: Dwight Eisenhower is the only President to have this happen to him at his inauguration.  What?
Answer: Be lassoed.
Song: Rodeohead
Artist: Hard N Phirm
Note: SCORERS: Teams do not have to get the name "Hard N Phirm."
93. Realm: Eight Men
Subrealm: Job Creation
Question: In order, they are a gambler, a guard, an innkeeper, a merchant, a doctor, a weaver, a blacksmith and a farmer.  Who are they?
Answer: The pawns on a chess board.
Song: Woo Hah!! Got You All in Check!
Artist: Busta Rhymes 
Note: Knights and bishops and queens aren't the only pieces that had assigned jobs.
Note: start fade after 2:48
94. Realm: Amazon.com
Subrealm: People Who Answered Question #94 Also Enjoyed Questions #78, #61, and #9
Question: Have you read your Amazon Web Services user agreement lately?  All 26,000 words of it?  Good, then this question should be easy!  The Terms of Service forbid you from integrating Amazon's new gaming engine with drones, robotic doctors or other outside devices.  However, that restriction will be lifted under special circumstances.  When?
Answer: In the event of a zombie outbreak.
Song: Once Bitten Twice Shy
Artist: Great White 
Note: start fade around 3:45
Note: "However, this restriction will not apply in the event of the occurrence (certified by the United States Centers for Disease Control or successor body) of a widespread viral infection transmitted via bites or contact with bodily fluids that causes human corpses to reanimate and seek to consume living human flesh, blood, brain or nerve tissue and is likely to result in the fall of organized civilization."
95. Realm: Investments
Subrealm: That's So Money
Question: On the NPR program "Marketplace" they always do an update of how things are on Wall Street that day.  If all the major market indicies are up, the background music is "We're in the Money".  If they're down, it's "Stormy Weather."  What do they play if the markets are mixed?
Answer: "It Don't Mean a Thing (If It Ain't Got That Swing)."
Song: Breakout
Artist: Swing Out Sister
96. Realm: Inventions
Subrealm: Hot or Not?
Question: It is believed the first post fire hydrant was invented and patented by Frederick Graff in 1801.  Why don't we know for sure?
Answer: Because the patent office containing the paperwork burned down.
Song: Paper in Fire
Artist: John Mellencamp
97. Realm: Presidential Protection
Subrealm: If You Get a Head Shot, Take It
Question: After he was unable to pass through the metal detector in 1997, who was told by the Secret Service that if he approached President Clinton, they would shoot him in the head?
Answer: Mr. Met.  (The New York Mets mascot with a giant baseball head.)
Song: Great Balls of Fire (AKA Great Balls of... 'FIRE!')
Artist: Jerry Lee Lewis
Note: The event was the 50th anniversary of Jackie Robinson's major league debut.
98. Realm: Libraries
Subrealm: Shh-hh-hh!
Question: Over 75 years ago, the Chapin Library received an unexpected anonymous donation of a vintage 19th century translation of Johann Goethe's "Reineke Fuchs."  Why wasn't Williams College happy to receive this book for its collection?
Answer: Because they discovered the anonymous donor had switched it for a stolen copy of Shakespeare's First Folio.
Song: Just Like Romeo and Juliet
Artist: the Reflections
Note: The stolen Folio was recovered five months later, and is available to be re-stolen.
99. Realm: Portland, Clear Lake, Kitty Hawk, Los Angeles, Brooklyn, Doswell and Chicago
Subrealm: But That Won't Help You
Question: The founding of Portland, Oregon.  The death of Ritchie Valens.  The pilot for the first heavier-than-air powered airplane flight.  The L.A. Lakers select Magic Johnson.  Ralph and Alice Kramden's marriage.  The lady who became the owner of Secretariat.  Gene Siskel's billing.  What do all these things have in common?
Answer: All were decided by coin flip.
Song: Washington on Your Side
Artist: from Hamilton
100. Realm: Pay Your Respects to Ancient Relics
Subrealm: We're Taha Noa Noa
Question: On your next European trip, we urge you to visit the Church of San Silvestro near Rome.  Then, go to the Residenz Museum in Munich.  Next, enter the Amiens Cathedral north of Paris.  What will you see in each of these locations?
Answer: They all say they have the authentic skull of John the Baptist.
Song: Me, Myself and I
Artist: De La Soul
101. Realm: Names
Subrealm: E-Trivia
Question: Wile E. Coyote's middle name is Ethelbert.  Alfred E. Neuman's middle name is Enigma.  Whose middle name is "Entertainment"?
Answer: Chuck E. Cheese.
Song: Round and Round
Artist: Ratt
102. Realm: Compositional Confoundments
Subrealm: Dame Music, You Have Betrayed Us Yet Again
Question: We don't expect song lyrics to be completely accurate.  But in 2004, when a Billboard #1 song included false instructions about how to use a particular product, the manufacturer was forced to issue a public correction.  What was the song, and what was the incorrect information?
Answer: "Hey Ya!" by Outkast; you should NOT shake a Polaroid picture.
Song: Tennessee
Artist: Arrested Development
103. Realm: Southern Accents
Subrealm: Extra Southern
Question: The Mexican language called Ayapaneco is at risk of going extinct.  There are only two fluent speakers left in the world.  What situation puts this language even more at risk?
Answer: The two speakers aren't talking to one another.
Song: Shaddup You Face
Artist: Joe Dolce
104. Realm: [make blowing "PPPTHHHHBBB!" sound]
Subrealm: No, Not That Kind of Raspberry
Question: Who out there likes raspberry-flavored drinks?  Yum yum yummy!  However, the source of the flavor is not from actual raspberries.  Where does it come from?
Answer: From beavers' asses.
Song: Damn I Wish I Was Your Lover
Artist: Sophie B. Hawkins
Note: Specifically, the castor sacs next to the anal glands.
105. Realm: All-Time Baseball Superstars
Subrealm: Will Not Be Part of This Question
Question: Designated hitter Ted Cox only had 58 at-bats and 1 home run in 1977, but his short career was enough to make him the only player in the history of baseball to do this.  What?
Answer: Rhyme with his team.  Ted Cox played for the Red Sox.
Song: Hocus Pocus
Artist: Focus
Note: 3:18 single version
Note: BONUS STUPID FACT: The Phillies once had an outfielder named Dave Philley.
106. Realm: Hacking
Subrealm: Coughing
Question: The FBI is considering relaxing its hiring policies in order to attract more computer hackers to work for them.  What policy is preventing them from attracting higher-quality hackers to the agency?
Answer: Most of the best hackers smoke pot, and won't pass the drug screening.
Song: Rip This Joint
Artist: the Rolling Stones