"Girls are crazy. If it wasn't for the sex and the laundry, I wouldn't put up with them." - Squuunt
"Here's to the wench. There's nothing like waking up completely rested next to a beautiful woman and going to shower only to come back and find your laundry folded your bed made and a cup of hot cider waiting for you." - Squuunt
"I have no legs. I left them in my other pants." - Squuunt
"I laugh at the mental image of you doing work." - Squuunt
"I'm the greatest thing to happen to women since the invention of the vibrator" - Squuunt
"My away message last night was "In the great tradition of my family, I've become the only white man to ever work"... Only, with me it's kinda true. See I can make it true, because Dad's more Sephardic than we are, so he's the hispanic, and you're half Loweeel, which means that all your work is done by your dark side" - Squuunt
"[My girlfriend] made beans last night, so before I went to bed I farted right in her face. She screamed, but none of the flesh melted off her skull, so I assume she was alright." - Squuunt
"Why the fuck would anyone hire a Comparative Literature professor to talk about international politics?" - Squuunt, on Edward Said
"You know what? I love my dog, and I probably won't eat it, but that doesn't that all animals are equivalent to people. For the most part people are better. Notable exceptions include communists, gender-feminists, old people who drive in both lanes 20 mph below the speed limit, and professors who grade people on how well the students agree with their own opinion. These people are of lesser worth than most cattle, and I would suggest using them for snack-meat if I thought there were the slightest chance that they would taste as good." - Squuunt
Squuuntworth: wesleyan's what new york would be like if all the smart people who are good at buisiness weren't there, and all their overprivileged hippy-ass kids were
Squuuntworth : oh wait
Squuuntworth: that's exactly what wesleyan is