Run Quotes (Amber)



A list of (hopefully) funny things that have been said in the Wednesday (Amber) session of the campaign.


GM: "Caine and Julian are very good friends."
Chris: "Being that they're both bastards?"

GM (During melee with local peasant scum): "At this point, you're putting a fairly serious dent in the local Joe Bob population."

GM: "Your information source just took a swing at you."

Adria: "I need to get a message to the local random warlord."

Random Warrior (in local dialect): "Ah! Rebel prisoner has ceased!"

Adria: "Okay, let's torture the prisoner."

Kate: "We have some bizarre arcaneness up our butts."
Chris: "I would recommend a proctologist."

GM: "It seems they have a variety of pens and papers here, in assorted fruit colors."

Alenosian noble during a croquet game [to Gavin]: "You'll get the hang of it. Perhaps you should concentrate more on getting the ball through the wicket, and less on hitting our balls."

GM, in reference to a Hellhound: "He's hurt, and wandering around in a bleeding sort of way."

Amy, in reference to something under her shirt: "Ferret whiskers tickle a lot!"

Chris, on seeing Spot do some damage: "And don't even think about messing with Random's canary."

Gavin: "Revolt this."

Leah: "Is there anything unusual lurking in the trees?"
GM: "Only the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal."

GM, referring to a Trump contact: "Gavin's got that not-so-fresh feeling in the back of his mind."

Tom, referring to Gérard: "Yeah, the one with the six foot sword who isn't compensating."

GM: "God only knows."
Chris: "Since god only knows, let's ask Dworkin."

Jess, confused over Jamie's epithet: "What's the 'random white thing'?"

GM: "You've got your hand over his mouth, and it's hurting. He's biting."
Jess: "Waitaminute, he's unconscious."
GM: "Yeah, good call. He's a sack of dead weight in your arms."

Random, having just been roused from his sleep by a Trump call from Adria, Janna, and Tom: "Well?"
Adria: "We got the commander of the rebel camp!"
Tom: "This was their idea."

Tom: "I'm not a bastard."
Adria: "Sure you are. You just need to embrace the bastard within your soul."

Adria: "I got a good spanking."
Tom: "Did you enjoy it?"
Adria: "Oh yeah. Spanking from the King."

Gavin: "The Cresewalians are getting their pants handed to them."
Tom: "On a platter?"
Gavin: "Yes, but we're talking on the order of having them pressed and folded."

Bob: "I know of some beasts that could do it."
Josh: "If we could summon Geryon's demons..."
GM: "He was thinking of the carnivorous pigmy elephants"

The Dude: "I could go around playing games of chicken with commoners."

The Dude: "You mean you want me to kick some ass."
Random: "I wasn't aware you did that sort of thing."
The Dude: "Neither was I!"

Cresewali guard: "Who are you?"
The Dude: "I'm The Dude of Amber."
Cresewali guard: "Oh. You're one of those."
The Dude: "Yeah, you dig. It's been so long since anyone's dug!"

Bob: "You'd use simple machines? What kind of man are you?"
Chris: "I'm Batman."

GM, depicting Gavin's woodchopping skills: "Ja wie ist die Superman. Super-duper-superman. Wham, wham, wham, wham, wham!"

Gavin, on the collapse of the Cresewali front: "So, I heard we've had a minor case of, uh, rout."

Chris: "If someone asks Benedict to play chess, he thinks for ten minutes, then says, 'Checkmate.'"

GM: "Do you know what this is?"
Bob: "It's your hand."
GM: "No, it's the smack, and it's coming for you."

GM: "He also talked about a sub-tropical climate and cat people."
Jamie: "Aw, shit!"
GM: "He said that to Gwenyth, not you."
Gwenyth: "He said something about a sub-tropical climate and cat people."
Jamie: "Aw, shit!"

Martin to Jamie, when seeing her on the beach: "Oh, I just didn't need to see your legs."

GM: "Martin's got three horses saddled and ready to go."
Jamie: "Pooky!"
GM: "To each, his own."

Kate to Amy: "What is it with your characters and beer?"

Jamie, hearing of Tom's capture: "That's scary, 'cause he's the most capable of the cousins of dealing with... um, strange shit."

GM: "Damn, we mystical. Word!"

Merlin, re: Geryon: "He's a cousin on the Chaos side..."
Gwenyth: "Okay..."
Merlin: "He's not your cousin. Be happy."

Chris: "I think I'll sprain my ankle. That sounds decent."

Jamie: "The cavalry is coming! The cavalry is coming!"
Gwenyth: "Time for a nap."

GM, commenting on clandestine plans: "I am inconspicuous. Wham, wham, wham. Now I am inconspicuous because you can not see."

Leah: "What happened to the one with the sword?"
GM: "He's dying."
Chris: "He's busy right now."

Gavin to Liira: "Pleasure working with you. Nice thrust."

Chris to GM as Gavin is getting his butt whooped: "I can't think of anything better to do. If anything occurs to me, let me know."

Jamie: "No pokey bits! No pokey bits!"

Geryon, trying to summon yet another pair of fencing blades: "They're ceramic."
Saklas: "No! What didn't you understand?"
Geryon: "They're combat ceramic."
Everyone: "What?"
Geryon (defensive): "Such things exist..."

Geryon: "I think I'll go play hostess now. Ah... Host."

GM: "He's a shell person, and he's sitting with two other shell people, and they're talking quietly, and isn't it cuuuuuuuuuute?"

GM: "How close do you want to go with your Pattern Lens?"
Kate: "Up their ass, I guess."
Chris: "But that would be infringing on the territory of the High Templar."

Jamie: "I am the High Templar. I don't go around seducing..."

The Dude, on a Raksasha's falling with its head crossing a line of the Primal Pattern, "He'll never get a headline."

Leah: "Yeah, it's a room full of women. Except for Hank. [Mike waves] Yeah, well, you're the GM, so you're kind of neuter."

GM: "Gavin throws the gun to you."
Janna: "Cool."
GM: "You may not actually know how to use one of these things."
Adria: "Pull the trigger."
GM: "Yeah, it's easy to figure out. Point and click."

GM, on people's trying to find guns on short notice: "Okay, lemme look up everyone's relative Pattern skills."
Jess: "Oh, great, I'm gonna end up with a turnip."

Adria: "It'll take me a moment to get it up."

Adria, to the Dude: "Enough of this 'Brandette' thing."
Geryon: "Just call him 'Fiona-spawn.'"

Geryon, answering a Trump from the Dude: "Jesus, Dude."
The Dude: "Either one will do."
Geryon: "You're covered in vomit!"
Bob: "Oh, and I don't show him the vomit."

Saklas: "And a really insane, dead Geryon is only slightly better than... [points at Geryon]."

Geryon: "The Logrus could actually come to your house and kick your ass."
The Dude: "Yes, a Logrusgram!"

Saklas: "Imagine the Logrus calling you at night... 'Are you wearing panties?'"

The Dude: "Wow, this Trump of Geryon's hot pink nipples is warm."

Amy: "Cwell could get him to change them to a different color."
Bob: "But if he loses concentration, bing!"
John: "They do not go bing!"

Adria: "You left Benedict in your other pants."

GM: "Fortunately, you and Estancion form an effective penetrating point."

To the OOC page
To the main page