Today it was time for another picnic lunch. I had one previously this week which was also delightful, but this time I went all out and bought a pound of Muenster cheese and some smoked salmon to compliment the loaf of bread my friend brought. We ate about half of the cheese. Then I finished the rest for dinner, with two thin slices left for late-night snack. Cheese is good. Eating a half-pound of cheese while doing customer service for a health website is even better. Really, I'm precisely the wrong guy for most of the products we hawk, namely health plans and religious essays. But I'm good at the job, and the people I work with are nice, so all is well.

    I had gotten a few burned movies from a friend on CDRs, but they weren't working on my computer. I could hear the sound, but not see any video. While I enjoy listening to comedy without any video, movies without video don't work as well for me. So I asked my friend over to help me fix it. Within a mere 15 minutes, she had video playing. There was only one small problem: the video played upside down and backwards, basically the view you would see if a mad scientist was holding you captive behind the projection screen, hung upside down. It was bizarre to watch part of a film as if you were trapped inside it.

    I suppose this has its advantages though. One of the movies I have is Spaceballs, a film which I've seen somewhere between 70 and 80 times at this point. There was one summer where we watched it every weekend. Before, I'd have been tempted to say that I knew the movie backwards, forwards, upside-down, and inside-out. But now I can actually watch it that way, which seems somehow appropriate for Spaceballs anyway.

    Of course if I was really trapped in a film, my life would have theme music. I've oft discussed with friends my disappointment over the lack of theme music in life. I mean, it would probably get pretty annoying if it was a musical, although it would be hilarious for anyone watching. It would be mildly amusing for mundane tasks, "...He's going to shop, going to shop, driving down to Stop and Shop! He's going to shop, going to shop, hope that jar of pickles doesn't drop! If you drop the jar of pickles then the pickle juice will trickle and the floor becoming slick'll make you trip and lose your nickels and you'll be in quite a pickle..."

    But it would undoubtedly be infuriating whenever you failed at something, "...They showed around your application, but not for employment. Your lack of skills and punctuation gave them all enjoyment. They laughed at you, for they have work while you're a worthless slob. You'll never get a job, never get a job, never get a never never never get a johhhhhhhhhhb..."

    Or the worst, a musical number breaking out when you were at a particularly intimate moment. Neither of the two I just came up with are things I really feel like printing here, so I'll leave this one to your imagination.