Kids' Shows of the 80s

While accuracy is the goal here, creativity is highly encouraged -- it may just get you an extra point.

Part One: The Cute Stuff (yecch):

1. What were the lyrics to Gargamel's "What will I do with Smurfs?" song?

2. What was Baby Smurf's first word?

3. What was the name of Gargamel's godfather?

4. Who was the witch Gargamel sometimes consulted about particular spells?

5. Where did the Smurflings come from?

6. In the infamous "purple smurf' episode, what was it that started the epidemic?

7. What was the setting of Belle and Sebastian?

8. Who kidnapped Baby Moondancer (one of the Little Ponies) and what species was she?

9. What species was her servant?

10. What was the name of the Ponies' friend, the baby dragon?

11. What was written on Paddington Bear's tag?

12. Who sent him to Paddington Station? From where?

13. Who was the leader of the Snorks?

Matching:

Part of the appeal of "My Little Pony" was certainly due to the butt tattoos that each Pony sported. Undoubtedly many a former collector of little Ponies presently wears similar body decoration, the result of this vile subliminal advertising. Now Cthulhu Matata gives you the chance to exorcise these demons from your soul by matching each My Little Pony with its very own butt tattoo.

14. Truly--
15. Powder--
16. Starshine--
17. Sky Flier--
18. Gusty--
19. Lofty--
20. Masquerade--
21. Twist--
22. Firefly--
23. Sparkler--
24. Posey--
25. Tootsie--
26. Trickles--
27. Fizzy--

• sunburst
• lollipops
• watering cans
• jump rope
• palm trees
• lorgnettes
• root beer floats
• bird with a flower
• kites
• snowflakes
• leaves
• ice cream cones
• lightning bolts
• diamonds
• tulips
• pretzels
• balloon

And, on the same note, we all remember the Care Bears and their disconcerting Care Bear Stares. Match the Care Bear to the tummy design, and write the color of each bear next to its name.

28. Funshine Bear--
29. Hugs--
30. Love-A-Lot Bear--
31. Cheer Bear--
32. Grams Bear--
33. True Heart Bear--
34. Tugs--
35. Share Bear--
36. Harmony Bear--
37. Tenderheart Bear--
38. Friend Bear--
39. Secret Bear--
40. Grumpy Bear--

• three interlaced hearts
• cupcake with a candle
• heart-shaped lock
• rose with ribbon around it
• big yellow sun
• star with a long trail
• rainbow
• trophy with heart on it
• two smiling daisies
• ice cream soda
• cloud raining hearts
• star inside pink heart
• big red heart
• two hearts together
• star wrapped in a blue cloth
• multicolored star with heart in middle

And, of course, there were the Care Bear Cousins, those misshapen freaks of nature. For this one, though, you'll have to identify the species of each Care Bear Cousin as well as color and belly tattoo.

41. Cozy Heart	a. elephant	1. heart with a crown
42. Noble Heart	b. pig	2. heart-shaped pillow
43. Bright Heart	c. cat	3. two rainbow hearts
44. Brave Heart	d. lamb	4. heart-shaped light bulb
45. Gentle Heart	e. horse	5. two clouds and a heart
46. Proud Heart	f. monkey	6. rainbow heart and star
47. Lotsa Heart	g. penguin	7. pink star with a red heart inside
	h. lion	8. heart with a knit cap
	i. rabbit	9. pink anvil with a little heart on it
	j. racoon	10. circle of hearts

Part Two: Lots Of Guys Beating Each Other Up:

48. What was the name of the ship that brought the Transformers to Earth?

49. What did Bumblebee become?

50. Which recurring Transformers character was never made into a toy?

51. What happens to the big gray trailer thing behind Optimus Prime when he transforms?

52. Which Aerialbot was scared of heights?

53. What was Cobra Commander's disfigurement that he always had to cover his face?

54. What was his final fate?

55. Who was the only person who could understand what Snakeeyes was saying?

56. What was the name of the Sorceress from He-Man when in bird form?

57. Who gave the moral at the end of every She-Ra episode?

58. What six character classes did the children become after going through the Dungeons and Dragons Ride?

59. What were their trademark items?

60. Which of the heroes got to be Dungeon Master for a day?

61. Why was one of the SilverHawks called Steetheart?

62. Give the full text of the chant that Mon-Star recited to become Mon-Star.

63. Give the full text of the chant that caused Mumm-Ra's transformation.

64. Who was Lion-O's predecessor?

65. Several episodes of "The Real Ghostbusters" were written by someone presently known for his place as creator and head writer of a current TV series. Who?

66. What ancient artifact allowed Miles Mayhem to find out the identity of the members of M.A.S. K.?

67. What did M.A.S.K. stand for?

68. Just who were Spider-Man's "Amazing Friends"?

69. Which kids' tv show featured a live-action version of Spiderman?

70. What was Danger Mouse's way of testing his strength?

71. Whose battle cry was "Ole! Ole ole ole!"

72. What song do the three vampires in Count Duckula's castle sing?

Part Three: PBS and All That Educational Crap:

73. Who is Mathman's nemesis?

74. Give the first names of Frankly and Monday from "Mathnet".

75. Write the Bloodhound Gang theme song lyrics.

76. What did the Gang always say when answering the phone in their office?

77. What was the clue the Gang used to figure out the identity of the man who called himself Copernicus?

78. What was the name of Bert's pigeon?

79. ...Bert's cousin?

80. What are "the most disgustingly cute things in the universe," according to Fraggle Rock? (so it's not PBS. It's Muppets.)

81. What are the names of the Trash Heap and her two attendants?

Part Four: The Leftovers:

82. What symbol could the Tomorrow People see in their heads that let them know they were Tomorrow People?

83. Who won the raft race in "It's the Great Race, Charlie Brown!"?

84. What was the name of the diamond frequently mentioned on "Garfield and Friends"?

85. What was Binky the Clown's usual greeting?

86. Name the giant chicken character from "Galaxy High."

87. What poem does Daffy Duck dazedly recite at the end of "Duck Amuck"?

88. What was the name of the singing frog from "One Froggy Evening"?

89. What was Moose's real name on "You Can't Do That on Television"?

90. What current pop star once had a part on "You Can't Do That on Television"?

91. According to "The Mysterious Cities of Gold", what were the Olmecs?

92. What were the Nazca lines intended to be?

93. What was the name of Tao's parrot?

94. What was Jem's (of "Jem and the Holograms" fame) real name?

95. ... her boyfriend's name?

Part Five: Go Ahead, Impress Us

96. Explain, in detail, the difference between Fox's animated "Ghostbusters" and ABC's "The Real Ghostbusters." Give thorough descriptions of both.

97. Drawing on the texts of any or all of the following (Pac-Man, Thundercats, Wuzzles, or Care Bears), explicate upon the psycho-sexual-socio-economic discourse contained therein. Refer to Freud, Lacan, Derrida, and Super Chicken's work on the same subject.

Part Six: