#1
Realm: All-Time Great Animated TV
Subrealm: Weapons Of Mouse Destruction
Question: Every schoolchild knows that the premiere homicidal feline and rodent team in television history is Itchy and Scratchy. But their psychotic reign has not gone without interruption. On the Simpsons episode "Krusty Gets Kancelled," the angioplastic clown loses the broadcast rights to the cartoon. As his ratings plunge, Krusty is forced to replace it with a lesser substitute. Enter "Eastern Europe's greatest cat and mouse team." What is the name of that joyless duo?
Answer: Worker and Parasite.
Song: "Back In The U.S.S.R." by The Beatles
#2
Realm: American Family Values
Subrealm: At Everyday Low Prices
Question: Who is worth exactly $847.63?
Answer: Maggie Simpson (when she gets swiped across the scanner in the opening credits).
Song: "Lost In The Supermarket" by the Clash
#3
Realm: Make It Longer
Subrealm: Make It Longer-Lasting
Question: What do the long-running sitcom "Father Knows Best," the even longer-running soap opera "Guiding Light," and the longest-running animated series ever, "The Simpsons," have in common?
Answer: All three shows are set in Springfield, USA.
Song: "I Only Want to Be With You" by Dusty Springfield
#4
Realm: All-Time Great Animated TV
Subrealm: 100% Simpson-Free This Time
Question: On his animated TV show, the Tick opts for "Spoon!" as his frightening battle cry. What is the preferred yell, repeated twice, of his sidekick Arthur, for when HE jumps into the fray?
Answer: "Not in the face!"
Song: "Shoot Me In The Ass" by Wesley Willis
#5
Realm: Chinese Military Geniuses
Subrealm: I'm Gonna Beat Up Steve Homer For Making Me Pronounce All These Names
Question: Tsao Zongtang was born in 1812 in Hunan province. He went on to mastermind several military victories for the Oing dynasty, including stifling the Taiping Rebellion and preventing the Xinjjang Uprising. But we xenophobic Americans don't really care about that stuff. How has Mr. Zongtang found everlasting fame here in the U.S.?
Answer: He's the namesake for General Tsao's Chicken.
Song: "Take Me Out" by Franz Ferdinand
#6
Realm: Lost in Translation
Subrealm: Mmmm.... Foreign Tongues
Question: The highest-grossing foreign language film in U.S. box office history was shot in what language?
Answer: Aramaic. ("The Passion of the Christ")
Song: "Whip It" by Devo
#7
Realm: Not Foxes, Per Se
Subrealm: More Fox-Like
Question: On rare occasions, alopecoid-- the condition of being fox-like-- can lead to dizziness and sudden collapse. Specifically, which rare occasion?
Answer: While at the National Spelling Bee. (That's the word the kid fainted while spelling, between the P and the E.)
Song: "Word Up" by Korn
#8
Realm: From Each According to His Ability
Subrealm: To Each According to His Worldwide Trademark Registration
Question: In late 2003, Mikhail Gorbachev filed for an exclusive copyright. For what?
Answer: His head stain.
Song: "Got A Lot On My Head" by The Cars
#9
Realm: (sing tauntingly) The Red Sox Won the Series!
Subrealm: (sing tauntingly) The Red Sox Won the Series!
Question: Some would say that the Red Sox rose from the dead to finally defeat the Yankees. Maybe because one of their secret weapons was an actual corpse. How did a dead body help Boston's comeback?
Answer: Surgeons did a test operation on the leg of a corpse, before temporarily fusing Curt Schilling's injured ankle so he could pitch Game 6.
Song: "Drop Dead Legs" by Van Halen
#10
Realm: The Red Sox Won The Series?
Subrealm: So, There's Hope For The Manhattan Skyliners
Question: Someone just as important to the 2004 Red Sox' success as Curt Schilling's necro-surgeons was a man named Nelson de la Rosa. Although he never threw a pitch nor swung a bat in anger, any rational person would agree that Nelson's contribution to the Boston victory was crucial. What role did he play for the Sox last season?
Answer: He was Pedro Martinez's personal lucky midget.
Song: "Super Mario Bros. 2" by the Minibosses
#11
Realm: Cinema
Subrealm: Academy Award-Free Cinema
Question: The title character of this movie is blind. He has a long beard, and incredibly bushy eyebrows. He's got a snazzy swastika on his outfit. His main ally is a man in a turban who can double the length of his arms. And the incendiary bombs he carries under his flowing robes are only his second-most effective weapon. Who is this title character?
Answer: The Master of the Flying Guillotine.
Song: "The Whole World Lost Its Head" by The Go-Go's
#12
Realm: Comics Strips
Subrealm: And College Rivalries
Question: Two popular current comic strips are produced by Amherst alums. Please name either the strips or the cartoonists. AND for a second point, where did we get this question? THAT'S RIGHT, IT'S THE NIGHT'S FIRST 3-POINT PLAY!
Answer: FoxTrot (Bill Amend) and Get Fuzzy (Darby Conley).
3-Point Play: Bill Amend wrote this question for us.
Song: "See You In Hell" by Monster Magnet
#13
Realm: Remember 2003?
Subrealm: Jog Your Memories For This Question
Question: What did the following names have in common in 2003: Chico, Elmo, Harpo, Bingo, and Fabio?
Answer: They're all names Dory mistakenly calls Nemo (in "Finding Nemo").
Song: "Ocean Breathes Salty" by Modest Mouse
#14
Realm: Unbelievably Irritating Speech Impediments
Subrealm: Even Worse Than Tom Brokaw's
Question: Who is the last character seen onscreen in "Who Framed Roger Rabbit"?
Answer: Tinkerbell.
Song: "I Don't Want To Grow Up" by The Ramones
#15
Realm: Great Moments In Glasnost
Subrealm: And Their Secret Influences
Question: Mikhail Gorbachev never claimed direct credit, nor did Ronald Reagan. However, what person says that their personal importance in bringing down the Berlin Wall has been unfairly overlooked by history?
Answer: David Hasselhoff.
(He says that he inspired the country to reunite, by singing "Looking for Freedom" at the Brandenburg Gate.)
Song: "Till The Walls Come Tumblin' Down" by J. Geils Band
#16
Realm: Life Imitates Art
Subrealm: Okay, Maybe "Art" Is Too Strong A Word
Question: A group is currently trying to amend the Constitution so that Arnold Schwarzenegger can become President. Which movie, set in the future, mentioned that this exact scenario had already happened?
Answer: "Demolition Man".
Song: "Walls Come Tumbling Down!" by Style Council
#17
Realm: The Second-Greatest Movie Monster
Subrealm: Made With Baking Ingredients
Question: As "Shrek 2" reaches its dramatic climax, a rampaging gingerbread monster walks down the main street of Far Far Away. As he lumbers through the town, he snaps the giant prop coffee cup off the facing of a Farbucks building, terrifying the javaholics inside. A crowd of them run screaming out of the Farbucks. To where do they flee?
Answer: Across the street, to another Farbucks.
Song: "When The Walls Came Tumbling Down" by Def Leppard
CONGRATULATIONS! YOU JUST SURVIVED THE FIRST ALL-"WALLS TUMBLING DOWN" SONG TRIAD IN WILLIAMS TRIVIA HISTORY! BUT WAS IT AN ISOLATED INCIDENT, OR A DEMONIC HARBINGER OF MORE SINISTER SONG LINKINGS YET TO COME? ONLY TIME WILL TELL!
#18
Realm: Come Here, Watson
Subrealm: I Need to Borrow a Few Bucks to Pay My Phone Bill
Question: If you've ever looked closely at your phone bill, you'll see a slew of extra taxes and fees. These include the 3% federal excise tax that's imposed on all telecommunications services, and which was originally supposed to be a "temporary luxury tax." This tax was
created to fund a specific project, but somehow, lawmakers never got around to repealing it afterwards. What was the temporary project we're all still paying for?
Answer: The Spanish-American War.
Song: "Ruff Ryders Anthem" by DMX
#19
Realm: Meteorology
Subrealm: The Professor Is All Wet
Question: Annual precipitation in Granada, Jaen, and Sierra Nevada, among other inland highlands, averages more than 50 centimeters. This definitively proves what?
Answer: The rain in Spain does NOT stay mainly on the plain.
Song: "On A Plain" by Nirvana
#20
Realm: Quickie Classics
Subrealm: Classic Quickies
Question: In 2004, Homer's "Iliad" was translated into this format for the first time. Which format?
Answer: Instant Messages. (Accept IM, messenger speak, text messaging format, etc.) (*Worse yet, Microsoft translated it to help promote MS Messenger.)
Song: "You Send Me" by Sam Cooke
#21
Realm: Pushing Tin
Subrealm: Any Which Way You Can
Question: According to the manufacturer, these come in 4 sizes and every can they produce has approximately 1750 of them. 1750 what? Can of what?
Answer: 1750 O's, in a can of Spaghetti O's.
Song: "All Or Nothing" by O-Town
#22
Realm: All-Time Great Movies
Subrealm: Depending On Who You Ask
Question: In 1973, the lead actor of a film was paid a whopping $250 for his performance. The film has since grossed over $600 million. Unfortunately, the actor didn't get points on the project, but he did get something else. Name the actor and the cinematic epic.
Answer: Harry Reems; "Deep Throat."
Song: "Protect Ya Neck" by Wu-Tang Clan
#23
Realm: It's a Game of Inches, When You're Surrounded By Chokers
Subrealm: No, It's Not Another "Deep Throat" Question
Question: Sports fans revere World Series heroes like Reggie Jackson, Orel Hershiser, or Josh Beckett. We call them lucky bums! The only reason they're heroes is because their teams happened to win. Big deal! What about the players who were just as clutch, only their teams let them down? We reject the cruelties of Dame Fate, and salute these forgotten non-saviors. Please name the ALMOST-hero of the following Series: 1986 Mets-Red Sox, 1991 Twins-Braves, and 2001 Yankees-Diamondbacks.
Answer: (ATTENTION PHONE PEOPLE: All we need are the 3 player names; game details are included for DJs only.)
#24
Realm: Ukrainian Snack Food
Subrealm: Atkins-Approved Snack Food
Question: Chocolate salo, known as the "Ukrainian Snickers", is all the rage in that country. Please describe this yummy confection.
Answer: Chocolate-covered pork fat.
Song: "Psycho Candy" by the Jesus & Mary Chain
#25
Realm: Suicidal Manic-Depressives, Suffering Rage-Induced Hallucinations
Subrealm: To George Bailey, The Richest Man in Town!
Question: What is by far the least stable piece of the Bailey house, in "It's a Wonderful Life"?
Answer: The bannister knob from the main staircase.
Song: "More Today Than Yesterday" by the Spiral Starecase
#26
Realm: Sports Figures Exposed
Subrealm: Thus Spake "The Sporting News'"
Question: It's been a bad, bad year for NHL commissioner Gary Bettman. Hockey owners locked out the players, probably cancelling the 2004-05 season, and few have noticed or cared. The television contract is puny. But perhaps Commissioner Bettman's lowest moment came with the release of the Sporting News' annual "Most Powerful People" list, which ranked him down at #40. Bad enough that the commissioners of football, baseball and basketball came in at #1, #3 and #4. But which un-macho sports icon beat Bettman by 2 spots, coming in at #38?
Answer: Janet Jackson's right breast.
Song: "One Headlight" by the Wallflowers
#27
Realm: Monty Python Were Not Standups
Subrealm: Neither Was J. Edgar Hoover
Question: Comedy Channel ran a 5-part series listing the Top 100 Standups of All Time. Name the 3 cross-dressers on the list.
Answer: Milton Berle; Flip Wilson; Eddie Izzard. (Also accept: Jonathan Winters)
Song: "Man! I Feel Like A Woman" by Shania Twain
WE ARE BREAKING IN WITH A SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT! CAN IT BE GOOD NEWS? SORRY TO SAY, IT'S ANYTHING BUT! HIDE THE LIQUOR AND WOMEN, IT'S THE RETURN OF THE DREADED "HORRIBLE SONG QUARTET"!
#28
Realm: Just When You Thought It Was Safe to Turn On the Radio
Subrealm: All-Time Great Debuts
Question: Only once in the history of the Billboard Top 100 chart were both the #1 and #2 spots filled by debut singles. What newcomers achieved this statistical feat?
Answer: Clay Aiken & Ruben Studdard (June 2003, "This is the Night" (Clay) & "Flying Without Wings" (Ruben)).
(Also: The #3 song that week was "God Bless the USA" by the full American Idol cast, including Clay and Ruben.)
Song: "Totally Gay, Totally Fat" by Oxford Collapse
#29
Realm: Vincent D'Onofrio
Subrealm: Looks Creepier Without The Insect Makeup
Question: In the first "Men In Black" movie, a dozen real-life celebrities are "outed" as aliens. THIS IS A THREE-POINT PLAY! For one trivia point, name any five of them; for two points, name eight.
Answer: Danny DeVito, Newt Gingrich, George Lucas, Isaac Mizrahi, Anthony Robbins, Dennis Rodman, Al Roker, Barry Sonnenfeld (the movie's director), Steven Spielberg, Sylvester Stallone, Dionne Warwick, Elvis Presley.
Song: "Rocket Man" by William Hung
THE HORRIBLE SONG QUARTET CONTINUES....
#30
Realm: All-Time Great Comedy Movies
Subrealm: Food Fight!!!!
Question: We know from the biographical sketches at the end of "Animal House" that Doug Neidermeyer was killed by his own troops in Vietnam. But who was the only "Animal House" character to die during the film itself?
Answer: The horse.
Song: "The Ballad Of Irving" by Frank Gallup
#31
Realm: What You're Doing Right Now
Subrealm: Web Searching
Question: What improbable term, entered into Google, brings you directly to the official White House biography of George W Bush?"
Answer: "Miserable failure."
Song: "Sunday Bloody Sunday" by George W. Bush *Technically, it's by The Dubya Project Dummy Down Players (NOT needed, phone people))
WHICH BRINGS US TO THE END OF THE FIRST HORRIBLE SONG QUARTET. THAT'S RIGHT, FOOLS.... THE *FIRST* ONE. BEFORE YOU DIE, YOU SEE THE RING.
#32
Realm: You've Got the Cutest Little Baby Face
Subrealm: Needs More Jingly Cat Toys!
Question: This actor's first professional job in show biz came at the age of 14 months. He was paid to pose on a calendar with some adorably fuzzy kittycats. Name this sweet li'l angel.
Answer: Christopher Walken.
Song: "I'm Walkin' " by Fats Domino
#33
Realm: Military Leaders of France
Subrealm: And Their Predictably Ignominious Battle Deaths
Question: In 1559, the death of France's King Henry II in an exhibition joust was the end of King Henry's career. But it was the turning point in someone else's. Whose?
Answer: Henry's death made Nostradamus' reputation (he'd predicted something like it).
Song: "He Knows" by Futureheads
#34
Realm: Island Nations
Subrealm: In The South Pacific
Question: Which South Pacific island nation's most profitable export is the sale of Internet domain names?
Answer: Tuvalu (which sells off their popular .tv domain).
Song: "Tu-Ra-Loo-Ra-Loo-Ral" by Bing Crosby
#35
Realm: Patriotism
Subrealm: Possibly Excessive Patriotism
Question: There is one place where the American flag has flown continuously, at full staff, day and night, for over three decades. Where?
Answer: The moon.
Song: "Harder To Breathe" by Maroon 5
#36
Realm: In Soviet Russia...
Subrealm: The Questions Google you!
Question: Way back in 1998, when Trivia players answered questions with their brains until the blood ran out their ears, Google was a fledgling little website. But in addition to a boring ordinary everyday websearch, it also offered two themed web searches. What were the themes?
Answer: Linux and Stanford.
Song: "Searchin' " by The Coasters
#37
Realm: All-Time Great Childrens TV
Subrealm: (say it like the Count:) 37! This Qvestion is Number 37!
Question: Who is the tallest recurring character on "Sesame Street"? Who's the shortest?
Answer: Big Bird; Slimey the worm.
Song: "It's Hard To Walk Tall When You're Small" by Morrissey
#38
Realm: Famous People In History
Subrealm: He's Chickening Out, He's Running Away
Question: Charles Lindbergh's paternal grandfather changed his last name when he came to this country after fleeing political persecution in Sweden. If he hadn't made that name change, what would Charles' full name have been?
Answer: Charles Mannson.
Song: "Stab Your Back" by The Damned
#39
Realm: Illegal Aliens
Subrealm: But The Kind Even Lou Dobbs and Bill O'Reilly Could Love
Question: Not counting his own Earth-name, E.T. develops an English vocabulary of 16 words. Name any eight for 1 point, or 14 of the 16 to put your finger on the THREE-POINT PLAY!
Answer: Alphabetical: B (aka "be"); come; Elliott; good; here; home; I'll; I'm; ouch; phone; ready; right; stay; thank; yes; you. (Full phrases: "B... good..." (later "be good"); "Ready"; "Elliott"; "I'm right here"; "E.T. phone home"; "Ouch"; "Stay"; "Yes"; "Thank you"; "Come"; "I'll be right here.")
Song: "Aliens Exist" by blink-182
#40
Realm: All-Time Great Composers
Subrealm: Working Mothers With Rhythm
Question: What do these three George Gershwin songs have in common: "I Got Rhythm"; "I'm About to Become a Mother"; and "Nice Work If You Can Get It"?
Answer: Each contains the phrase, "Who could ask for anything more?"
Song: "More, More, More" by The Andrea True Connection
#41
Realm: Slurs Across the Centuries
Subrealm: Galileo! Galileo! Galileo, Will You Let It Go? Ishmillop, NO!
Question: The Instititute & Museum of the History of Science in Florence, Italy is NOT for the overly sensitive. Because if you walk into the wrong room, unprepared, you could very well assume that a great scientist is dissing you. How so?
Answer: The museum displays Galileo's middle finger.
Song: "The Bird's the Word" by the Rivingtons
#42
Realm: Alanis Morissette and Groucho Marx, Together at Last
Subrealm: And Not Just in Our Steamiest Fantasies
Question: What does Groucho Marx have in common with Gene Hackman, Alanis Morissette, Charlton Heston, Faye Dunaway, Morgan Freeman, Graham Chapman, Val Kilmer, George Burns, Mel Blanc, and Hank the Angry Drunken Dwarf?
Answer: Each has played God in the movies.
Song: "To Be With You" by Mr. Big
#43
Realm: Put On a Sweater
Subrealm: A Scarf Would Be Nice, Too
Question: What is the unique feature of negative-40 degrees?
Answer: It's the only temperature where Celsius & Fahrenheit readings are the same.
Song: "A Question Of Temperature" by Balloon Farm
#44
Realm: All-Time Great TV Shows
Subrealm: Standing Pat
Question: This show's namesake has a diameter of 8 feet, 6 inches. Name this all-around television performer.
Answer: The "Wheel of Fortune."
Song: "You Spin Me Round (Like A Record)" by Dead Or Alive
#45
Realm: Perhaps This Question Should Have Been Bagged
Subrealm: But It's Not Worthless
Question: The year 2001 saw the first use of the word "scumbag" in newspaper comics. Kindly tell us which scummy strip dared to break the taboo and use that word.
Answer: "Mary Worth".
Song: "Boomin' Granny" by the Beastie Boys
#46
Realm: Creepy Literature
Subrealm: Maybe "Literature" Is Stretching It
Question: In May, Slate magazine ran an article detailing the many common elements found in two popular book series, including "corrupt authority figures", "political agendas", and "bad guy's wormy sidekicks". Which two series did they find had so much in common?
Answer: "Harry Potter" and "Left Behind".
Song: "God! Show Me Magic!" by Super Furry Animals
#47
Realm: Nothing To Do With "Left Behind"
Subrealm: Harry Potter
Question: Ron Weasley's pet has three names-- one rodent, one human, and one Hogwarts nickname. Name those names.
Answer: Rat-- Scabbers; Human-- Peter Pettigrew; Nickname-- Wormtail
Song: "99 Problems" by DJ Danger Mouse (*accept "Jay-Z & the Beatles")
#48
Realm: Do Not Panic
Subrealm: Proceed Calmly To The Nearest Grocery Store and Purchase A Month's Supply Of Slim Jim
Question: Before every hurricane, we always see the same old cliched TV coverage. Lots of empty shelves, as residents race to the stores and buy up all the supplies. Based on sales records, which product sees the biggest jump in pre-hurricane purchases?
Answer: Beer.
Song: "Wasted on the Way" by Crosby, Stills, & Nash
#49
Realm: Absentee Voting
Subrealm: Think of the Postage!
Question: Texas is the only state that permits its residents to cast absentee ballots from where?
Answer: Space.
Song: "Guilty" by Gravity Kills
#50
Realm: For What It's Worth
Subrealm: Stop, Hey, That's About Two Points
Question: What do the following songs have in common, among others: Basket Case, Mesmerize, Bizarre Love Triangle, Life During Wartime, Baba O'Riley, and For What It's Worth?
Answer: The titles are never sung as part of the lyrics.
Song: "Words" by Missing Persons
#51
Realm: It's a Big Country
Subrealm: Somebody's Got to Embarrass It
Question: It's always a nice thing to go to New Hampshire. After that, South Carolina and Arizona and North Dakota and New Mexico are lovely in the spring. Next, you should go to California, and Texas, and New York. Then, South Dakota and Oregon and Washington and Michigan. And finally, you can wrap up your journey in Washington D.C. How should you punctuate this lengthy all-American trip?
Answer: "YEEEAAAAAAAARRRRRGHHHH!!!" (NOTE: These are the states listed by Howard Dean during his much-replayed caucus speech.)
Song: "Nearly Lost You" by Screaming Trees
#52
Realm: Great Moments In Plastic Surgery
Subrealm: Before Botox
Question: Who used the most Teflon in 1986?
Answer: The Statue of Liberty. (During restoration, it was added to her copper skin to prevent corrosion.)
Song: "Slippery People" by Talking Heads
IT'S THE SECOND HALF OF THE CONTEST. YOU'VE GOTTEN A SECOND WIND. SO, LET'S BEGIN THE SECOND HORRIBLE SONG QUARTET!
#53
Realm: Holiday Television
Subrealm: Christmas Treat, Or Lazy-Ass Programmers? You Make The Call!
Question: During Christmastime, cable networks kill time while their Nielsen ratings are in the toilet... er, we mean, they join in celebrating that most glorious of seasons, by running the same holiday movie over and over again. Last month, TBS showed "A Christmas Story" for 24 hours straight. AMC re-re-re-re-rebroadcast the original "Miracle On 34th Street." What Yuletide classic aired all Christmas day on FX?
Answer: "Jingle All The Way."
Song: "I Farted On Santa's Lap" by The Little Stinkers
#54
Realm: Quit Your Yapping
Subrealm: Or We'll Have You Spayed or Neutered
Question: Which popular small dog breed underwent a name change in April, 2003? Please give us both the old and new names. WOOF! THIS IS A THREE POINT PLAY! We know the song title matches the trivia, but for an extra point, tell us why THIS particular musical artist is an even better clue.
Answer: Old: Jack Russell Terrier; New: Parson Russell Terrier
Song: "Once Bitten, Twice Shy" by Great White. For the extra point: Great White's lead singer is Jack Russell!
#55
Realm: "The Daily Show"
Subrealm: And Now, Our Chief Question 55 Correspondent
Question: "The Daily Show" has been keeping its eye on the situation in Iraq, or as they call it, "Mess O'Potamia." Last April, the Daily Show reported that which country was threatening to withdraw its troop?
Answer: Tonga. (Incidentally, the troop is named Hale.)
Song: "Coming Home Soldier" by Bobby Vinton
#56
Realm: Slugs In Our Nation's Capital
Subrealm: Amazingly, Few Of Them Are Members Of Congress
Question: You live in the Washington, D.C. area, and are known as a "slug". What is it that you do to earn this nickname?
Answer: You hitch rides with drivers so they can use the carpool (or HOV) lanes.
Song: "New York New York" by Wendy Mae Chambers (NOTE TO DJ: AFTER SONG PLAYS ONCE, SAY "PLAY IT AGAIN!" AND REPLAY SONG OVER THE AIR.)
THERE'S ONLY ONE THING WORSE THAN A HORRIBLE SONG QUARTET. AND THAT'S A HORRIBLE SONG QUARTET THAT ENDS WITH QUESTION #56. WE HAVE A LONG WAY TO GO, AND VERY LITTLE MERCY.
#57
Realm: Celebrity Behavior
Subrealm: The Artist Formerly Known as Baba Booie
Question: Prince did it in 1991. Howard Stern did it in 1992. Marilyn Manson did it in 1998. What?
Answer: Wore an ass-exposing outfit at the MTV Video Awards.
Song: "Cheek To Cheek" by Fred Astaire
#58
Realm: Orson Welles' Supporting Roles
Subrealm: Even Greater Than His Turn in "The Muppet Movie"
Question: According to Harry Lime in "The Third Man," Italy under the Borgias had warfare, terror, and bloodshed, but produced Michelangelo, da Vinci, and the Renaissance. Whereas Switzerland enjoyed 500 years of unbroken peace, democracy and brotherly love. And what did that produce?
Answer: The cuckoo clock.
Song: "The Bird" by The Time (accept Morris Day)
#59
Realm: All-Time Great Jewish Pitchers
Subrealm: Other Than Harvey Fierstein
Question: Sandy Koufax tossed a perfect game, his fourth no-hitter, in September 1965. What all-time major league record was also set in this game?
Answer: Fewest hits by both teams (one). Opposing pitcher Bob Hendley was the losing pitcher, on an unearned run, despite having given up just one hit in eight innings.
Song: "Breakout" by Swing Out Sister
#60
Realm: Oy Vey!
Subrealm: Hey, Rocky, Watch Me Pull A Rabbi Out Of My Hat
Question: What very common item in New York City was recently reported to have become non-kosher?
Answer: Tap water. (The water was found to contain tiny crustaceans, called copepods. Jewish dietary law forbids any ingestion of crustaceans.)
Song: "Float On" by The Floaters
#61
Realm: Bands That Should Have Retired 15 Years Ago
Subrealm: Metallica
Question: When Metallica held a search for a new bass player in 1987, after the death of original bassist Cliff Burton, one of the people who tried out was future Primus leader Les Claypool. However, Metallica gave a valid reason for not selecting him. What was it?
Answer: He was too good.
Song: "Big Bottom" by Spinal Tap
#62
Realm: Road Hogs
Subrealm: This Vehicle's Got a Lot of Horsepower
Question: This vehicle was first produced in 1936. The current version boasts a V-8 engine, two-tone seating for six, a global positioning system, and weighs 5,000 pounds. Which vehicle is it?
Answer: The Oscar Mayer Weinermobile.
Song: "Roll With It" by Steve Winwood
#63
Realm: Crime And Punishment In Minnesota
Subrealm: Bring Back Governor Ventura!
Question: Last May, when gas prices reached record highs, Minnesota's Commerce Department snapped into action, levying fines between five and seven thousand dollars each to several gas stations for breaking the law. What crime did these miscreant companies commit?
Answer: Charging too little. (*Minnesota law requires that stations sell gas for at least eight cents over cost.)
Song: "Get The Lead Out" by Aerosmith
#64
Realm: For The Last Time...
Subrealm: The Answer Is NOT "These Were All Used in Tonight's First Action Trivia!"
Question: What do these things have in common? Furniture, art, a house, a fur coat, an emu, and a monkey?
Answer: They are some of the things the Barenaked Ladies would buy you, if they had a million dollars.
Song: "Big Time" by Big and Rich
#65
Realm: It's The Threepence Opera
Subrealm: And Prices Are Steep
Question: What was the most notable thing to cost 3 pence per pound in 1773?
Answer: The Boston tea tax.
Song: "Into the Drink" by Mudhoney
#66
Realm: Religion
Subrealm: Mmmmm.... Speaking in Tongues
Question: In what language was the first complete Bible in America printed?
Answer: That of the Algonquin Indians of Massachusetts. (Accept just "Algonquin".) (It was translated by Reverend John Eliot and published in 1663.)
Song: "Scenario" by A Tribe Called Quest
#67
Realm: More Bible Trivia
Subrealm: They Didn't Poll The Algonquins
Question: In 1900, what book was ranked by Americans as their second favorite, after the Bible?
Answer: The Sears Roebuck catalog.
Song: "You Look Through Me" by Book Of Love
#68
Realm: Local Trivia
Subrealm: Check Your Algonquin Bible For The Translation
Question: This is an unincorporated section of East Brookfield, Massachusetts, comprising about six square miles. There is a cemetery and school nearby, but precious little else. In Algonquin, the name means "boggy place". What is this place called?
Answer: Podunk.
Song: "Angry Johnny" by Poe
#69
Realm: Criminal Comestibles
Subrealm: The Rape Of The Land
Question: Each of you has eaten the product of the rapeseed. By what euphemistic name do we know this product, and how was the new name derived?
Answer: Canola oil. The name "canola" is based on the term "Canada Oil". (*Rapeseed growers figured, probably correctly, that "rape oil" wouldn't sell well. It is another unfortunate circumstance that this question was #69.)
Song: "Born Slippy" by Underworld
#70
Realm: All-Time Great Authors
Subrealm: No, Seriously
Question: Vladimir Nabokov's "Lolita" includes a character named Vivian Darkbloom, who is a playwright and author. How did Vladimir Nabokov come up with the character's name?
Answer: It's an anagram for "Vladimir Nabokov."
Song: "You Can Look But You'd Better Not Touch" by Bruce Springsteen
#71
Realm: Venti, Vidi, Vici
Subrealm: It's Greek To Me
Question: What six words will you find on the side of just about every Greek diner-style coffee cup you see?
Answer: "We Are Happy To Serve You."
Song: "Tom's Diner" by Suzanne Vega
#72
Realm: Watching Sweaty, Grunting Women
Subrealm: We're Talking About Tennis, Pervert!
Question: The All-England Tennis Club recently decided to replace the seats at Wimbledon for the first time since 1922. The seats were still in good condition, so what brought on this change?
Answer: The average fan's butt is now too big to fit in the old seats.
Song: "Wrong Side Of The Moon" by Squeeze
#73
Realm: I See Dead People
Subrealm: Oh, It's Just Teams Coming Down For The Next Action Bonus
Question: Besides their patented twist endings, each of M. Night Shyamalan's thrillers have something that is exactly the same in each. What is it?
Answer: Running time. (They are all 106 minutes long)
Song: "How Long" by Ace
#74
Realm: The Logitech Z-5500
Subrealm: It's So Much Better Than That Z-5499 Hunk of Crap
Question: The Logitech Z-5500 multimedia speaker system has a bonus feature, not mentioned in the manual, that you may discover upon using the volume control. What is it?
Answer: The volume goes to "11".
Song: "Making Plans For Nigel" by Primus
#75
Realm: Annie Small
Subrealm: Sweet and Very Lowdown
Question: We're not talking number of lines, we're talking literal physical size. What are the two smallest film roles played by Woody Allen?
Answer: Second-smallest-- Z the Ant ("Antz"); Smallest-- The "cowardly sperm" ("Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Sex...").
Song: "White Room" by Cream
#76
Realm: Long Ago
Subrealm: And Favre Away (NOTE TO READER: "Favre" is pronounced "FARVE.")
Question: The Packers' Brett Favre has been in the NFL a long time, and holds the record for most consecutive starts by a quarterback since the 1970 merger. But the guy who caught his first NFL pass is also still in the league. Who is it?
Answer: Brett Favre. His first NFL pass attempt was deflected back to him.
Song: "Baby Come Back" by Player
AND NOW, A WORD ABOUT HORRIBLE SONG QUARTETS. PHILOSOPHER-KINGS HAVE DEBATED FOR CENTURIES, "PRITHEE, WHAT IS A HORRIBLE SONG?" THERE ARE AS MANY ANSWERS AS THERE ARE STARS IN THE HEAVENS, GRAINS OF SAND ON THE BEACHES, OR SKIN BLEMISHES ON THE ORIGINAL "STAR TREK" CAST. THE ONLY KNOWABLE TRUTH IS THAT ONE MAN'S HORRIBLE SONG IS ANOTHER LISTENER'S TRANSCENDENT WORK OF DERANGED GENIUS. AND SO, PREPARE YOURSELF FOR THE FIRST-EVER "HORRIBLY BRILLIANT SONG QUARTET." DON'T TRUST YOUR EARS.... OPEN YOUR HEART.
#77
Realm: Yards and Yards of Deadly Monkeys
Subrealm: Does This Make Sense?
Question: What do the following have in common: Deadly sin, rooms, element, sense, yards, yards, monkeys?
Answer: They're all Bruce Willis "numbered" movies: (The First Deadly Sin, Four Rooms, The Fifth Element, The Sixth Sense, The Whole Nine Yards, The Whole Ten Yards, Twelve Monkeys).
Song: "Has Been" by William Shatner
#78
Realm: Demonic Creatures That Walk the Earth's Face
Subrealm: "Toy Story"
Question: What is Andy's best birthday gift in "Toy Story"? What's his best Christmas gift?
Answer: Birthday - a Buzz Lightyear doll; Christmas - a puppy.
Song: "Gimme Stuff" by Rappy McRapperson
THE HORRIBLY BRILLIANT SONG QUARTET CONTINUES....
#79
Realm: Marketing
Subrealm: Your Plastic Pals Who Are Fun To Be With
Question: "Bricks" is too specific, as is "plates". "Pieces" makes it sound like it's broken, "components" is too technical-sounding, and "parts" just isn't euphonic enough. What is the official term for the plastic things that make up LEGO sets?
Answer: LEGO elements.
Song: "Brick House" by Lionel Richie & Rob Zombie
#80
Realm: Hello, Dalai
Subrealm: Free Tibet! Nepal, Half Price!
Question: Fearful that the potential suffering of thousands would "violate Tibetan values", the Dalai Lama wrote to the leader of this potential invader, demanding they stay out of Tibet. Which invader?
Answer: Kentucky Fried Chicken. (The "thousands" would be the chickens.)
Song: "Honky Tonk Women" by some geese
AND SO CONCLUDES THE HORRIBLY BRILLIANT SONG QUARTET. YOU MAY HAVE CRINGED, YOU MAY HAVE SUFFERED, BUT WE ASSURE YOU.... YOU HAVE EVOLVED.
#81
Realm: Comedy Central Shows
Subrealm: That Nobody Watches
Question: What three-word question is asked by the host in every episode of "Insomniac With Dave Attell"?
Answer: "What's that smell?"
Song: "Time Bomb" by Rancid
#82
Realm: All-Time Great Movies
Subrealm: Starring Current Governors
Question: What line is spoken in all three of the Terminator films?
Answer: "Get out."
Song: "Bounce" by Sarah Connor
#83
Realm: Old-Time Radio
Subrealm: Even Older Than Williams Trivia
Question: In 1933, the Oxydol company bought some radio airtime. Besides selling a little more Oxydol, what did this do for American culture?
Answer: Oxydol was a soap. The show was "Ma Perkins," which thus became known as a "soap opera."
Song: "Clean Up Woman" by Betty Wright
#84
Realm: Tick, Tick, Tick
Subrealm: Ka-BOOM!
Question: Based on scientific examinations following atomic bomb tests, which creatures are the most likely to survive the effects of a blast?
Answer: Scorpions.
Song: "Radiation Vibe" by Fountains of Wayne
#85
Realm: Trivia's Island Paradise
Subrealm: Take A Friggin' Guess
Question: Tonga may be tiny, but it leads the whole, entire planet in at least one category. Whereas countries like England and Germany only have one of these per every 10 citizens, Tonga boasts almost 8 for every single inhabitant. Eight what?
Answer: Pornographic webpages. (*Tonga has been called the "porniest country in the world.")
Song: "I'm a Pig" by the Angry Samoans
#86
Realm: (*PLAY SPECIAL CD LABELED "PHYSICAL", TRACK 1) "Let's Get Physical, Physical..."
Subrealm: (*PLAY SPECIAL CD, TRACK 2) "I Want to Get Physical... Let's Get Into Physical!"
Question: For what is the grandfather of Olivia Newton-John also famous?
Answer: He's famous for winning the Nobel Prize in Physics (in 1954).
Song: "Boys In The Hood" by Dynamite Hack
#87
Realm: Big
Subrealm: Small
Question: The two smallest ones belong to Francis Lightfoot Lee, and Joseph Hewes. The two biggest ones belong to Robert Treat Paine, and a person we can't mention because it'll give away the question. Biggest and smallest what?
Answer: Signatures, on the Declaration of Independence (Biggest: John Hancock).
Song: "Big John Is My Name" by Rare Earth
#88
Realm: Biblical Trivia
Subrealm: This Time, Algonquin-Free!
Question: What rather formidable accomplishment does Jacob achieve in Genesis 32?
Answer: He beats God in a wrestling match.
Song: "Hold Me Tight" by Johnny Nash
#89
Realm: All-Time Mediocre Animated TV
Subrealm: Scooby-Doo
Question: What two-word phrase best sums up Scrappy-Doo's attitude towards life?
Answer: "Puppy Power."
Song: "The Power" by Snap!
#90
Realm: Sit, Fido, Sit!
Subrealm: Now Eat This Cheap Crap
Question: What is the best-selling brand of dog food in the United States?
Answer: Ol' Roy (also accept "Wal-Mart brand")
Song: "I Keed" by Triumph The Insult Comic Dog
#91
Realm: TV Trivia
Subrealm: Smooth Transitions
Question: Most recurring segues on TV shows use basic establishing shots with music, like "Seinfeld"s twangy bass guitar and apartment building, or "Roseanne"s harmonica and housefront. Other shows get more atypical. For example, "Batman" used a spinning bat logo. THIS IS A THREE-POINT PLAY! Answer just one for a point, or any three for two points. Which series make use of the following unique segues between scenes?
a) Bubbles;
b) 3 quasars shooting through space;
c) A copy machine, separating paper;
d) Rabbits?
Answer: Bubbles-- "Spongebob Squarepants"; 3 quasars-- "SuperFriends"; copy machine separating paper-- "The Office"; rabbits -- "Teletubbies."
Song: "Fade To Black" by Evan Dando (accept The Lemonheads)
#92
Realm: The Eternal Battle
Subrealm: Man vs. Meatball
Question: Where could you see the faceoff between The Ultimate Male and The Ultimate Meatball?
Answer: In "Rocky 3." (The charity wrestling match between Rocky Balboa & Thunderlips.)
Song: "Eminem vs. Ragtime" (*no other artist needed)
#93
Realm: Colleges In Massachusetts
Subrealm: Go East, Young Man
Question: How did Berklee College Of Music, in Boston, get its name?
Answer: Its founder's name is Lee Berk.
Song: "Mr. Lee" by the Bobbettes
#94
Realm: What, Us Worry?
Subrealm: We Got to Question #94!
Question: The money for the MAD Magazine board game comes in 4 denominations: $500, $1,000, $5,000, and a single $1,329,063 bill. However, there is only 1 way to get the big money. First, you must land on the appropriate space. Then, you must meet one basic requirement. What?
Answer: You must be named "Alfred E. Neuman."
Song: "Brand New Man" by Brooks and Dunn
#95
Realm: Going 95 Times Platinum?
Subrealm: Now That's Just Ostentatious
Question: According to the Recording Industry Association of America, 28 albums have sold 14 million copies in the U.S. But only two music acts have topped that number three times, for 3 separate albums. Name them.
Answer: The Beatles; Garth Brooks. (Beatles: White Album (19 million); Beatles 1967-70 (16); Beatles 1962-66 (15). Garth Brooks: No Fences (16 million); Double Live (15); Ropin' the Wind (14))
Song: "Nice Boys" by Nashville Pussy
#96
Realm: Second Verse
Subrealm: Same As The First
Question: This question is a THREE-POINT PLAY! Many cover versions of old hits have been hits again. But it takes special talent to cover yourself successfully. Who is the only artist to reach the Billboard Top 10 with a new version of their own previous hit, then repeat the same feat a second time? That is, one artist, two songs, 4 versions, four Top 10 hits? Three other performers managed to accomplish this oddity one time apiece. For a second point, name any one of the three.
Answer: Elton John. ("Candle in the Wind" and "Don't Let the Sun Go Down on Me") The Ventures ("Walk-- Don't Run"); Neil Sedaka ("Breaking Up is Hard to Do"); Dobie Gray ("Drift Away").
Song: "Nickelback to Back" by Nickelback (*Phone people Ð song title not needed)
#97
Realm: Radio Shows
Subrealm: Radio Shows With Fewer Listeners Than We Have Right Now
Question: Al Franken tried to provoke a lawsuit for months, but no dice. What did he do that failed to make him the defendant?
Answer: Called his Air America radio show "The O'Franken Factor." (No matter how hard they tried, Bill O'Reilly STILL wouldn't sue them!)
Song: "I'm Left, You're Right, She's Gone" by Elvis Presley
#98
Realm: All-Time Great Movies
Subrealm: Starring Brain-Addled Surfer Dudes
Question: What actor appeared in all four "Matrix"es? That's right, all four.
Answer: Carrie-Anne Moss, who also starred in the 1993 TV series "Matrix" (which lasted 13 episodes).
Song: "You're The One" by The Vogues
#99
Realm: Comic Strip Cats
Subrealm: Who Don't Love Lasagna
Question: In the comic strip "Peanuts", what is the name of the cat that lives next door to, and sometimes takes swipes at, Snoopy?
Answer: The cat's name is World War Two.
Song: "What's New, Pussycat?" by Tom Jones
#100
Realm: Famous Rock Stars
Subrealm: With Equally-Famous Eyeglasses
Question: When Reginald Dwight legally changed his name to Elton John, he also changed his middle name, from "Kenneth". What is it now?
Answer: Hercules.
Song: "So Sad To Say" by The Mighty Mighty Bosstones
#101
Realm: All-Time Great Literature
Subrealm: Be Our David Gest
Question: Before she became a weird, freaky old bat, Liza Minnelli was a weird, freaky little kid. And as a kid, she was the direct inspiration for a classic book. Which book?
Answer: "Eloise" (by Kay Thompson).
Song: "Room Service" by Bryan Adams
#102
Realm: Quentin Tarantino, Elizabeth Taylor, Mr. Creosote, and Dr. Seuss
Subrealm: Together at Last
Question: What do the films "Reservoir Dogs," "National Velvet," and "Monty Python's The Meaning of Life" all have in common with one another, as well as the Dr. Seuss book "Hop on Pop"?
Answer: All contain characters named "Mr. Brown."
Song: "It's A Man's World" by James Brown
(NOTE: Question #102 was the last to be asked on-air by Worker & Parasite.)
#103
Realm: What's Black and White and Read All Over?
Subrealm: A Nun Falling Out the Window.
Question: What five U.S. newspapers have the highest circulation while NOT being published in Washington, New York, or Los Angeles? Name three for 1 point, or all 5 for two. EXTRA! EXTRA! THIS IS A THREE-POINT PLAY!
Answer: Chicago Tribune (8th overall); Houston Chronicle (9th); San Francisco Chronicle (10th); Boston Globe (11th); Arizona Republic (12th). (NOTE: We're not counting USA Today because Washington, New York and L.A. are amongst its homes.)
Song: "Headline News" by Weird Al Yankovic
#104
Realm: All-Time Great Baseball Teams
Subrealm: Darrrrryl!
Question: The 1986 Mets liked to play a drinking game with a deck of cards. The game had just two rules. If a Met picked a red card, he had to take a drink. But what did he have to do whenever he picked a black card?
Answer: Pick another card.
Song: "Diamonds And Guns" by The Transplants
#105
Realm: Bad As I Wanna Be
Subrealm: But No Worse
Question: Dennis Rodman decided to sell his Newport Beach, CA mansion this past year. What reason did he give for wanting to move?
Answer: He claimed his neighbors partied too much.
Song: "Tattooed Millionaire" by Bruce Dickinson