Stuff The Student Body Should Definitely Do

1. Embrace the revolution.
   1. Against anchor housing?
   2. Not possible in Mission. The hallways are too small and riot-proof.
2. Learn the difference between "you're" and "your."
   1. Also between "there," "their," and "they're."
   2. And "whose" and "who's."
   3. And "to," "two", and "too," while we're at it.
   4. And "It's" and "Its," for the love of God.
   5. And "then" versus "than."
   6. And "Good" and "Evil"
   7. And my personal favorite, "which" and "that."
   8. And that "quote" is a verb, not a noun. That's "quotation"! On the contraty, "quote" is both a verb and a noun.
3. Learn that which constitutes a valid argument.
   1. Not possible in Mission. The hallways are too small and riot-proof.
4. Unpop collars.
5. Form a volunteer regiment to fight in Iraq and one to fight in Iran and in N. Korea and France and all the other bad guys who hate our freedom.
6. Repop collars.
7. Drink less hate-orade.
8. Learn how to be an unforgivable cunt about grammatical issues.
9. Have more bitchfests on the blogs.
10. Realize that humanism is like a boot stomping on a human face forever.
11. Realize that existentialism is a humanism.
12. Visit Dartmouth and learn Beer Pong, which is way better than Beirut.
    1. Play Beer Pong obsessively.
       1. Our campus isn't really configured quite right for beer pong.
13. Reconfigure campus for Beer Pong, while we set up anchor housing.
14. Drink alcoholic beverages sometime.
15. Unpop collars once more.
16. Make puns.
17. Act like obnoxious dicks at the snack bar.
18. Amuse random alums who edit the wiki.
19. Guard against acting like tools. Self check, especially when drunk.
20. Get into more blog bitchfests when there's work to do.
21. Stop working and go out and get drunk and pull up stakes and smash bikes like the true inner tool you are.