Deadly Ten

Officially known as the Deadly Ten, 2008.

Despite Williams' small size and the fact that everyone seems to know everyone, or is at least connected to them somehow, it remains a fact that it's impossible to know everyone. And there are some people that it REALLY seems impossible to know, for one reason or another.

The defining characteristic of the Deadly Ten is that no one can know them all. It is a physical impossibility. Were someone to know nine and finally meet the tenth, said someone would disappear from the space-time continuum, as if they had never existed. Or he/she might spontaneously combust. We're not sure which.

I don't know all of the deadly ten, as evidenced by the fact that I'm not dead.

But here are some guesses, and, oh, yeah, do not sign these statements if you value your lives:

1. Sara Carian: Pretty obscure. Most people think she's a senior. And since she's going to Oxford next year, it'll look like she was.

2.) Ben Wood: Silent, but deadly.

3.)

4.) Chris Paci. This one is particularly difficult due to the fact that he is taking/auditing not 4, not 5, but 7 classes, as well as his penchant for impromptu day trips to Prague.

5.) John Salcedo. Always giving, kind to strangers and the sons and daughters of the World (check his community service record), must practices lethal martial arts, universal facial features, knowing gaze, stealthy yet hard to miss, but who knows anything else about him?

6.) Greg Tobkin. He's an evil genius in his spare time. He won't write a thesis in his senior year...he'll write two. And cure cancer. But at what price???

7.) Corey Beverly. Sure, you might be friends with him on facebook or have seen him rocking out with Wyclef, but who can REALLY say that they know him? ...oh yeah. Probably all of you.

8.) ?

9.) ?

10.) ?

For the flip side of the coin, see the Undeadly Ten.