Ode to Harvard

A poem, song, rap, or "ode" written by Diana Davis '07 in the fall of 2003 explaining why Williams is just so much better than Harvard.

If Williams had rejected me, I wouldn't be an Eph;

I'd have had to go to Harvard, source of everlasting grief.

I'd be living down in Cambridge, in that hallowed Harvard yard

Where orgueil is the assumption, even more than working hard.

Harvard. I didn't go to Harvard.

I didn't go to Harvard. I didn't go to Harvard.

In this 1600 mecca, they all worship the AP;

A four-point-oh is not enough; they've all got four-point-three.

My jacket would have ve-ri-tas emblazoned on the chest

So that everyone who saw me would know that I was the best.

Harvard. I didn't go to Harvard.

I didn't go to Harvard. I didn't go to Harvard.

My "small" classes would be forty; my "professors" all TA's,

And who would care if during class my eyes would often glaze?

I'd try real hard to find my niche, but even when I did,

I'd still be what Ross Baird called "just another Harvard kid."

Harvard. I didn't go to Harvard.

I didn't go to Harvard. I didn't go to Harvard.

When I say I go to Williams, people blink and say, "um -- where?"

But if you say you go to Harvard, you just get an awestruck stare.

Some kids will go and hate it; they'll spend four years being glum;

But it's worth it when you graduate, 'cause then you're an alum!

Then down the road, when someone asks you where you went to school

You can say you went to Harvard and make him look like a fool.

Harvard. I didn't go to Harvard.

I didn't go to Harvard. I didn't go to Harvard.

But I can't -- I go to Williams: land of mountains, fields, and trees,

Where the smog and smoke of cities never interrupts the breeze;

Where our uniforms are purple and we proudly sport the cow;

Where for discussions, nineteen is the most that they allow;

Where my lecture class is fifty; my professor knows my name,

And everyone I meet seems genuinely glad they came.

Harvard. I didn't go to Harvard.

I didn't go to Harvard. I didn't go to Harvard.

So when they send you your certificate to hang upon the wall,

Know that Williams over Harvard is an easy judgment call.

Although I know that any school I go to, I will love,

I'd rather spend my life somewhere that fits me like a glove.

Williams. I go to Williams.

I go to Williams -- I didn't go to Harvard.