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The bad-ass-est mo-fo in the [[Class of 2006|class of '06]], Brian Hirshman has:
#Taken seven classes at a time#Attempted to drink a gallon of milk in one hour, twice#Eaten a handful of red pepper #Signed up to write a thesis and two mini-theses#Stuck it to the man #Spent Halloween night alone in Hopkins forest #Threatened to declare his own Mountain Day, if Morty failed to do so #Won a cheesecake in a pumpkin hunt #"Explored" about half of the "vertical surfaces" on campus #Worn exclusively shorts for an entire winter season in Williamstown #Unabashedly opposed Opposed [[anchor housing]] unabashedly #Run for [[College Council]] President, along with the dearly departed [[Amarnath Santhanam]], and let the latter throw a pie in his face upon their defeat#Turned everything in [[Dan Burns '06]]'s room backwards.
# Petitioned the state of Kentucky to transfer Prof. Morgan, an honorary Colonel in the state militia, to the navy, so he would become [[Captain Morgan]].
# Walked to Lower Mission and driven off-campus to buy dinner because Driscoll was closed and Mission dining hall was too far away
# Carried a tub of ice cream out of the dining hall on his tray for the consumption of those dining outside.
# Studied with his friends in [[Bridge Club]] and [[Captain Morgan]] to become an accomplished bridge player.# Eaten a matzah bacon cheeseburger# Submitted a randomly generated paper as a thesis draft# Driven 827 miles to watch his younger brother play tenns, and would gladly do so again# Camped at Death Valley in August# Sought to co-teach CS334 in the spring of 2006, seeing as the computer science department didn't have a prof for the class, but was not given permission to do so# Read the majority of "The Brothers Karamazov" in a single night# Been waiting for the right weather conditions to play on playing Frisbie Golf on the Taconic Golf Course# Learned to type using a Dvorak keyboard layout
He has also been a prominent member of the [[College Bowl]] team, [[Williams Trivia]], and [[Chess Club]].