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Stuff Morty Should Definitely Do

51 bytes added, 15:54, November 11, 2005
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# Move New York City 30 mins from campus.
## Seconded, in the biggest way.
### Or move the campus 30 mins from New York City.
# Make a public speech announcing that he henceforth wishes to be referred to as "The Hammer".
# Use proceeds from the $400M Capital Campaign to buy an iced-out medallion in the shape of the new Student Center to wear around his neck at all times. Then, inscribe the words, "Morton Owen 'Big Thangs' Schapiro" on said medallion.
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