| 291 | My Second Favorite Organ |
| 268 | Yoyodyne Propulsion Systems |
| ~248 | A Wretched Hive of Scum and Villainy |
| 209 | A Super-Intelligent Shade of the Color Blue |
| 188 | Phasers on Stun |
| 174 | Veiled Prophet of Corason |
| 173 | Frosted Flakes |
| 170 | The Cabana |
| 162 | Rocky Mountain Oysters |
| 159 | The Manhattan Skyliners |
| 125 | Sherman and Peabody |
| 117 | Hell's Entry |
| 109 | Capoto |
| 102 | Lehman Late Nighters |
| 64 | Mother Strapalonians |
| 59 | Rall |
| 53 | Fairweather One |
| 52 | Dream Suite |
| 46 | Madmen from Morgan West |
| 43 | Seven Grams is Not Enough (*) |
| 41 | Energetic Barbarians |
| 39 | Plant Corn Early |
| 28 | The Compromising Positions |
| 26 | The Cunning Linguists |
| 22 | Terry |
| 17 | Zap! |
| 15 | Naked Men with a Hard-On, a Picture of -?-, and a Butcher Knife |
| 14 | Some Call Me Tim |
| 13 | The Definite Article |
| 13 | Beethoven on the First Floor |
| 11 | The Original Wackos |
| 11 | Morgan East |
| 10 | Eight Foot of Solid Watusi |
| 10 | The Mongolian Cluster Fuck |
| 9 | Zionism is Racism, But He Assured Me He Is a Zionist |
| 7 | Williams F |
| 7 | Bailey's Comets |
| 6 | Steve Shapiro's New Camero |
| 4 | Smith, Wesson, and Me |
| 4 | Zinba's Sword |
| 4 | Harriet's Attack Committee |
| 4 | Move Over, Vesper |
| 3 | Opus |
| 3 | The Brett and Vic Fan Club |
| 2 | Tall Willy at Walcott's |
| 2 | Consequences, Shmonsequences, As Long As I'm Rich |
| 2 | Squeal Like a Pig |
| 2 | Me, Two Dogs, and a Vicar |
| 2 | The Way-Outs |
| 2 | Donna Ching's Thigh |
| 2 | Boomerang Fish Act |
| 2 | We are Frothing Bones |
| 1 | Renegade Nurses from the Planet Sphincter |
Five teams were credited during the first scoring update, but omitted at 8 am: Jim is -?- and He Knows It (2 pts.); Dale (1 pt.); Chaotic Evil Habits on a Flying Broomstick (1 pt.); Curry and Room 304, George Winston (1 pt.); Guilty Until Proven Innocent (1 pt.).
Not a terribly exciting race, as My Second Favorite Organ's nightlong lead clomped inexorably from 3 to 5 to 8 to 16 to an eventual 23 over a never-challenged-for-second-place Yoyodyne Propulsion Systems.
My Second Favorite Organ lost its best chance to hit 300 points when, in a highly atypical decision, Wile E. Coyote elected not to give a second Super Bonus. With just one 20-point Super, five 3-point Action Trivia, and no Ultra Bonus yet, a team could have answered 95% of Wile E.'s trivia and still would have finished at 299. Despite the sleepy cakewalk, though, a full 22 teams were still playing at 6 a.m.
With competitive drama lacking, teams were reduced to sending out challenges of paltrier and paltrier natures. A typical on-air challenge of the mid-1980s was for teams to "play without books," the primary source of trivia info in those pre-internet times. The six-player Phasers on Stun (5th) challenged all teams to go one step further and "play without use of brains," saying that they had set the tone by burning theirs out hours ago. Yoyodyne Propulsion Systems, not to be outdone, suggested that teams should "play without telephones." Barring that, Yoyodyne dared teams to sample their "truly vile" clam dip. Meanwhile, A Super-Intelligent Shade of the Color Blue (4th) actually challenged A Wretched Hive of Scum and Villainy to a physical fight over some ill-defined slight. In the finest Trivia tradition, naturally none of the challenges were accepted by anyone.
Hosts Wile E. Coyote were an amalgam of former winners. Back-to-back champs Chicago 60609 were on a roll, having hosted one year earlier. And the always-dangerous "Phil Walsh team" that'd developed a sudden 1983-84 habit of coming in second, after winning its first two contests as lower frosh (Singleman Party) and lower sophs (Smedley Terrace). The combination had proven lethal to the Spring 1985 competition. But a mass defection of seniors after the Spring '85 win led to a "seat of the pants" approach to running by those who remained.
Previous Spring '85 hosts Nasty Big Pointed Teeth had followed their hosting chores by breaking up into two parts, roughly along undergrad/alumni lines. The lower and upper Teeth would finish 2nd and 3rd in this contest, with the undergrad faction (Yoyodyne Propulsion Systems) beating out the alums (A Wretched Hive of Scum and Villainy).
Wretched Hive did win honors as the best small team, an achievement they would claim often through the rest of the 1980s. After this brief flirtation with a Star Wars-inspired name, they would return to their Pythonian roots and win the following Spring contest as "The Giant Pygmies of Beckles." (Incidentally, Wretched Hive's 3rd-place score total was not provided with the others, and has been approximated at 248 points based on other updates and score data.)
Although Yoyodyne won Round One in the battle of former Teeth, they would finish second again in the following May 1986 contest (as "Chernobyl Homeowners Association") while the aforementioned Pygmies leapfrogged over them from third to first. One year after this contest, the Yoyodyne gang would win the storied "Tonga" overtime battle that ended the Pygmies contest.
Frosted Flakes (7th) was the best freshman team in December 1985. A decent start, but they would swiftly mature into the dominant team that became known and feared as "The Evil Empire." After losing the aforementioned Winter 1986 Tongan heartbreaker two contests later, they would proceed to win 3 of the next 4 contests thereafter.
It is not known what connection, if any, the 24th-place Cunning Linguists had with the team of the same name that won and ran the contest in 1980.
The 20th-place team, "Seven Grams is Not Enough," was a late name switch, spending most of the contest as the much-more-betterly-named "I Have Neither Given Nor Received AIDS."