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My Dad
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Balderdash. My Dad is the 1st century epic poem The Aeneid. How would your pathetic dad feel about the fact that, while he was whining to his parents about his curfew, I was being raised entirely in dactyllic hexameter? I would guess that he would feel terrible.
The Aeneid? How unfortunate. Well, the movie Underworld was based loosely on the exploits of my dad. How would your insufferably long, battle weary, Virgil conceived Dad feel if he got slayed by a vampire that happened to be my dad? I would guess that he would feel terrible.