Revision as of 19:20, November 8, 2005 by (talk)

A school filled with scalliwags, villains, and other low-lifes. They stole half of Williams College's library when they began their misadventure, and they've only gone downhill from there.

They've decided that a man best known for distributing smallpox infested blankets to Native American children would be an amazing person to commemorate by naming a school after him.

They also have a really ugly campus. And they stole a lot of the same names for buildings, like Chapin, Tyler, Fayerweather, and Morgan halls.

Additionally, it should be noted that the word "Amherst" should always be pronounced with as much emphasis on the H as possible. (This is because Amherst students insist on pronouncing the name of their school "Ammerst.")

There are several ways in which you can help remove this pest. Firstly, contact your local pest control. They usually know how to sniff out early signs of people who harbor pro-Amherst feelings. They will eradicate it with speed and proficiency.

If that is not possible, then wear a t-shirt that insults Amherst (available at Goff's).