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Men's Golf Team

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Team members and alums
[[Category:Athletics]]
[[Image:hole3.JPG|right|thumbnail|a Williams treasure: Taconic Golf Club]]The Williams Men's Golf Team is one of the most successful Division III golf programs in the country and is the 810-time defending Little Three Champion. The team has made the 23-team [[NCAA]] Tournament field 9 of the last 11 years10 times, with its best finish a 10th place showing in 1999. Roster size generally ranges from 10-14 players whose golf games range from scratch to 3 or 4 handicaps. Certainly one of the best perks of making the team is enjoying unlimited playing and practicing privileges at the beautiful [[Taconic Golf Club]].
[[Image:Brumbag.jpg|left|thumbnail|"Old Saggy" '05]]Present and past members of the golf team, along with their nicknames, are listed.
'''Class of 2009:''' Rahul Bahl (Hard H, Squirrel, Captains for the Indian), Chris Chiang (Chianger), Matt Felser (15)2010-2011 season are Bob Camp, Logan GerrityDrew Murray, David Ramsay (Rammerz)Jack Killea, Tyler Zaraand Jake Wagner.
'''Class of 20082014:''' Brendan Conley Cody (LapdogSmelly)Semmelrock, Jeff Lin Ross (Linny the Pooh, Linnypooh, ChrisHusband)Bowen, Nicholas Nottebohm Dylan (Nick, on occasion?America)Dethier, Nick Ryder^ and Jake (Cup, Walmart), Don Wieczorek^ (Gary, Woogie, DonnieSnake)Abrahams
'''Class of 20072013:''' Kevin Kellert (StiltsRyan Brand, LambdaJack Ervasti, KevboWyatt (Mudbone) Sparks, Shits, Sandhill Crane, Tuberculosis, Chief Tall Bear, Space Constant)Hrishi Srinagesh, Alex Mallory (Dirtbag, 13, DB), Frank Haluska^Xu
'''Class of 2012:''' Siwol Chang, Chris Valle, Mario Mastromarino, Ari Kerstein '''Class of 2011:''' Bob Camp, Drew Murray, Jack Killea (Loaf), Jake Wagner, Jack Wadden^, Rob Kalb^ '''Class of 2009:''' Rahul Bahl (Hard H, Squirrel, the Indian), Chris Chiang (Chianger), Matt Felser (15), Logan Gerrity, David Ramsay (Rammerz, Youngblood), Tyler Zara (owl), Galen Jackson '''Class of 2008:''' Brendan Conley (Lapdog), Jeff Lin (Linny the Pooh, Linnypooh, Chris), Nicholas Nottebohm (NotteBOOM, sick boy), Nick Ryder^ (Cup, Walmart), Don Wieczorek^ (Gary, Woogie, Donnie) '''Class of 2007:''' Kevin Kellert (Stilts, Lambda, Kevbo,Sandhill Crane, Tuberculosis, Chief Tall Bear, Space Constant), Alex Mallory (Dirtbag, 13, DB), Frank Haluska '''Class of 2006:''' John Kildahl (Johnny Booze), Will Sirignano (C-Ring, High Octane, Nano), Matt Slovitt (Slops), Tim Evans (Timmy), Matt Wilka^ (Wilka-monster)
'''Class of 2005:''' Kurt Brumme (Old Saggy, Old Saggy Brummbag, General Brumsfeld), Zach McArthur (Z-Mac, Uncle Z, Beached Whale, Uncle Th), John Harris^
Here are some recent memories of monument and misfortune that will go down in golf team history.
==Uncle Z=The 570===
Uncle Z would forever cement himself in the annals [[Image:09EphsWmsInviteChamps.jpg|right|thumbnail|The spoils of Golf Team Lore by coming no less than 20 times to Williams College the victory]] After a year AFTER he graduated. In fact according to some testimonialsand a half of self-proclaimed underachievement, he was sighted more in 2006 the Ephs stepped up their games at parties than the year earlier2009 Williams Invitational. The "A" squad fired an impressive 288 on day 1, led by Jack Killea and Chris Valle's matching 70s. Uncle Z The "B" squad was first spotted not too far behind with a 297, led by freshman Rahul BahlJack Ervasti's 70. After Saturday, Chris Chiang, and Matt Felser at the first "official golf partyA" at the B. He would then continue to keep squad sat in contact with the golf team via golf parties. In factfirst place, it soon became more 2 shots clear of a surprise not to see Uncle ZSalem St. As our adopted uncle, Uncle Z not only met up with Slovitt and Lapdog in Europe, but happened to visit the golf team on Spring Break6 ahead of NYU....forever cementing his tie with the freshman
Then came Sunday. Junior Jack Killea brought his scuba gear to Taconic with a clever 6-under 29 on the front side. In totally unexplored territory, the sweat glands got working a little bit, and Jack made the surprising decision to play the back nine with a rain glove on his right hand. Ass in a handbag, or whatever, one golf professional noted. But it worked, as Jack fired a 67 for a 137 weekend total and the individual 2nd place. He was helped by a 68 from Jake Wagner, a 73 by Chris Valle, and a 74 by Wyatt "Chip-in" Sparks. In total, the "A" squad posted a slim 282 on Sunday. The 570 total was good for a 10 shot victory. Not to be forgotten, the "B" squad fired a 303 for a 600 weekend total. Appropriately, the entire team was given glass Taconic 24-oz. mugs as awards.
==The Sighting of Lambda’s Feet==
Despite the fact that the 2006 Spring Break trip was more subdued than year’s===The 590=== past, one incident remains fixed in the minds of the Spring Breakers[[Image:08NESCACgolfChamps2. After heavy drinking coupled jpg|left|thumbnail|2007-2008 NESCAC Champions]]The 2007-2008 Ephs arrived at Shuttle Meadow with golf clubs and a determination to have a crazy night, Johnny Booze decided it would be a great idea to steal things from around the hotel and bring them back to the Beirut roomlist of demands. The items includedTwo days later, but were not limited to: hallway paintingsthey walked out with Tervis Tumblers as freshman Jack Killea, hallway trees, and most importantly the luggage trolley from downstairs. Mr. Slovitt was quite indignant at Booze’s lack of “respect” for the hotelDrew Murray, Jake Wagner and decided it would be wise for him to hand deliver the trolley back to the receptionist…beer in hand. However, upperclassmen Matt Felser took a liking to the trolley, and insisted that he be wheeled down in the trolley itself. Slovitt proceeded to wheel Brendan Conley lapped the trolley down and park it field in the corner Connecticut with Felser still drinking and half passed out in the trolley (Felser would remain there for a good 20 minutes right across from the receptionist)590. Not convinced that he had apologized properly, Slovitt had a 20-minute conversation with the receptionist, ending with 66 Hoxsey threw a request party for the key to Lamda’s roomnewly crowned NESCAC Champions that will never be forgotten. Key in hand, Slovitt rounded up the troops, and they not only stripped down to our boxers, but quietly pounced onto Lambda who was innocently in bed. With 10 men on him, Lamda was very nervous at the homoerotic behavior, which included Suggested listening: 1. Looking at Kevin’s Bellybutton and 2 Admiring Kevin’s Ridiculously Big Feet. The surprise visit ended abruptly when MalloryList of Demands, sick with the flu, pounced onto Slovitt and started choking him, screaming for everyone to leave…. anything about Hotlanta 
===Stu's Miracle===
Williams' major golf rival is [[Skidmore College]], the other elite program in the Northeast District. One of Skidmore's best players in the last few years has been Stuart Drahota '07, who has become an idol in the eyes of many on the Williams team -- and not only because of his ultra-cool green shoes that read "STU", his winning a tournament by shooting 66 with rental clubs after his were stolen the night before, his very tight relationship with Alex Mallory, or his showing up at Kevin Kellert's 21st birthday party on the Williams campus. Stu is everywhere. He even bumped into John Kildahl '06 during the summer of 2006, but not in Williamstown, or even the US. They were the only two people left late at night in a deserted train station - in Prague.  "Stu?!" "Johnny Booze?!" [[Image:Stu.jpg|right|thumbnail|STU]]
'''2:00''' Luci spente."
 
===Uncle Z===
 
Uncle Z would forever cement himself in the annals of Golf Team Lore by coming no less than 20 times to Williams College the year AFTER he graduated. In fact according to some testimonials, he was sighted more in 2006 at parties than the year earlier. Uncle Z was first spotted by freshman Rahul Bahl, Chris Chiang, and Matt Felser at the first "official golf party" at the B. He would then continue to keep in contact with the golf team... via golf parties. In fact, it soon became more of a surprise not to see Uncle Z than to actually see him. As our adopted uncle, Uncle Z not only met up with Slovitt and Lapdog in Europe, but even happened to visit the golf team on Spring Break.
===Rounds to Remember===
16. Team two-round record 290-293 = 583 at Taconic in September, 2001.
 
17. Ryder beating Kevin in the final putting match, Spring Break 2005.
==Team traditions==
Coach Pohle appears to schedule the golf tee times so that the team's hangovers (and his own) wear off before the first ball is hit. Often playing at 1pm, and of course, ALWAYS with a cart, the team's golf is inconsistent, to say the least. In 2004, freshman Alex Mallory followed up a generous 115 at Hawk's Nest with a 69 two days later at Grand Harbor to win the alumni tournament.
More important than the actual golf rounds in 2005 were the pre-round putting matches. In perhaps the most epic golf match ever played on a putting green, Nick "Cup" Ryder made three straight 20-foot benders to beat Kevin Kellert 1-up on the 18th hole at Hawk's Nest, ensuring Kevin would not win the overall putting title. Ryder raced around the green to high-fiving teammates and old people alike after every made putt, and during the match said he wanted to make putts against Kevin more than he had ever wanted anything before. The victory improved Ryder's putting record to 2-7, but was by far the most impressive round of Ryder's year, easily trumping his collection of tournament 70's and 71's.
Some of the better courses hacked up by the team are "Not So" Grand Harbor's River course (nickname by Ned Wydysh '04...), Hawk's Nest, BallenIsles, PGA Golf Club's Dye course, The Fox Club, and the McArthur Club. The worst course played is certainly Sand Ridge - "off to Sand Crotch again," said Ned at the beginning of every Spring Break.
Housing on Spring Break has varied quite a bit in recent years. 2003 and 2004 were spent in one of the grossest Motel 6's in the world, where dogs ran wild, some rooms appeared to contain entire extended families, and a prostitute wanted to smoke up with Ned Wydysh and Bryan Harmon '04. In 2005, after getting kicked out of Motel 6 (maybe it was the plywood thrown in the pool, BH?), Rick Pohle hooked the team up with 2 condos overlooking the PGA Golf Club. It was paradise. Night golf on the par-3 course out back was common and more beirut was played than ever before. In 2006, it was a slight step down to a hotel setup -- neighboring guests in the hallway apparently kept wondering why the boys next door played so much ping-pong late at night... [[Image:woogie.jpg|center|thumbnail|night practice]]
===The Olde Forge===
[[Image:bobseger.jpg|right|thumbnail|Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band]]
The beginning of the love affair between the Williams Golf Team and the music of Bob Seger was when Will Sicks '03 and John Kildahl '06 picked up a Seger tape at a gas station on [[#Spring break|Spring Break]] 2003. Seger was the preferred music of that entire break at Motel 6, and by the end of it, the entire team knew the words to his Greatest Hits. Many CDs were burned, Seger was played at every golf event and car ride to and from the Forge, and every time you heard him you thought of Spring Break and a smile came to your face. Bob Seger has remained as a presence at all golf team social functions. "We've Got Tonight" will be played at many a golf teamer's wedding in the distant future.
 
At 7:30pm on January 27th, 2007, Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band play a concert in Boston, MA. This is part of Bob's first tour since the early 1980s, and some believe the tour is in direct response to the Williams Men's Golf team writing letters and begging for a re-appearance on his fansite. Needless to say, many Eph golfers are attending and after four years of belting out Seger's Greatest Hits, they are as ready for this concert as anyone in the country. May God Bless Bob Seger for making dreams come true.
===Rap Classics===
===Halftime Putting Contest===
[[Image:Halftim.JPG|right|thumbnail|Mike D, Wilka-monster, Stilts, 13, Rossy, Old Saggy, Z-Mac, C-Ring, Slops, and BH after the 2004 Halftime Putting Contest]]At the halftime of the [[homecoming]] [[football]] game, the team gathers at (stumbles to) Taconic for a putting contest. Anyone not completely inebriated (Kevin, hrmph) should not participate. Recent winners have included Matt Slovitt in 20032004, Brendan Conley in 20042005, his decisive victory capping off a fantastic fall with the flatstick, and Kurt Brumme in 20052006, and making a 40-footer for the victory. Rahul Bahl in 2006may have won something that year, but it was not the official HPC.
Talking wasted with Coach Pohle is not required, though it seems to happen every year and end ends poorly every time. "Enjoy the second half."
===Broomball===
The men's golf team has won most of the last two contested college [[winter study]] IM [[broomball]] championshipsin recent memory.
In '''2004''', Bryan Harmon '04 scored every regular season goal for the team, capping his incredible one-man show with a key late-game breakaway backhand goal over Choir goalie Dan Krass's shoulder to send the team into the playoffs. Once in the playoffs, Zach McArthur '05 took over, scoring every post-season goal, including an early-game rifle from the blue line that won the championship 1-0 over the very cheer-happy [[Fayerweather|Fay]] 2 squad. Ned Wydysh '04 was a rock in goal, allowing but one regulation goal all year and stuffing Rugby time and again in an exciting semi-final playoff shootout.
In '''2006''', two new team members stepped up as rising stars to successfully defend the broomball crown. Tim Evans '06 and Matt Felser '09 took advantage of playing the regular season half-ice as the team went undefeated. In the playoffs, the team coasted through until the championship, when they had to play shorthanded the whole game, and with Kevin on the ice to boot! Despite basically playing 2-men down the entire contest, the golf team triumphed once again for their second straight playoff crown. This could not have been done, of course, without the help and amazing skills of newcomer, Stacey "a stud on the ice" Baradit. Gray T-shirts with a purple & gold argyle design on the front and "Kevin's always watching" on the back commemorate the golf team's broomball success.
 
In '''2007''' and '''2008''', the golf broomball team was led by Tyler Zara and Matt Felser, with help from young boyband frontrunner Kevin Coombs and netminder Keith Butts. With such an impressive first line, the Ephs went undefeated for two seasons and picked up new argyle t-shirts along the way.d
===Quotes by Coach Rick Pohle===
[[Image:Coach.jpg|left|thumbnail|Coachie Von]]
 
"R&P"
 
"or whatever"
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